One Face Too Many

One Face Too Many

A Poem by ReedWrite
"

Rambling again

"



There you are with your plastic Ken-doll face,

Photo-shopped perfection, in time and space.

Those ooo’s and aww’s…and society’s applause,

You wear sainthood with such humility and grace.

 

Yet behind closed doors the guise melts away,

Shriek your obscenities, oh bird of prey.

The façade crumbles…the demon rumbles

One face too many…a strategic display.

 

There you are in your mask of silver and gold,

Hammered into perfection, the idealized mold.

Those approving nods…from paragons and gods,

And with thirty bright coins you’re bought and sold.

 

Yet behind closed doors let pretenses fade,

                Scream your invectives, sharpen your blade.

The façade crumbles…the demon rumbles

One face too many…the deceiver's charade.

 


© 2016 ReedWrite



Author's Note

ReedWrite
Not sure where this one came from...but it felt good writing it anyway.
Still a little rough...any thoughts?

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Featured Review

There are very few who are straight - they show a different face to different people (who hasn't laughed too heartily at a boss's joke in front of a spouse/partner only to have them look as if they don't know who you are?) but then there are those who take it to a whole other level.
This needed to be said. It was said. I hope it did you good ReedWrite. It felt good to read.

Posted 11 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ReedWrite

11 Months Ago

Thank you, Tony.
I'm not sure if felt good to write...but you're right...it needs to be said... read more


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Reviews

So,,,,strong,,excellent writing.I dont think it needs anything,,,,Love it

Posted 6 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ReedWrite

6 Months Ago

Thank you, Sas! That means a lot, coming from you. I appreciate you taking the time to read and comm.. read more
my third wife was much like this subject of the poem...

i relate...as Hamlet said to Ophelia...
"you have one face and paint yourself another"

love this poem...

Posted 10 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ReedWrite

10 Months Ago

Perfect quote, Jacob! Exactly.
Thank you for reading and commenting.
Well done! Good description of masked fake people who try to deceive you with all tools of false image.

Posted 10 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ReedWrite

10 Months Ago

Thank you, Tanmay.
Appreciate your review very much.
I thought this poem was creepy in a good way. I always try to be as honest as possible without being too blunt so it's interesting to peer into the mind of someone who is quite opposite.

I really did enjoy the first line, especially when you said, "ken doll face." It said a lot to me. Those words told me that this person is plastic, fake, and hollow. I kind of wish you had expanded on it because I thought the line was powerful enough. Expanding on it would make it more chilling like is this person's eyes like paper: thin, unreal, always concocting stories? Idk, that's just my opinion. I thought the next lines were just as beautiful.

This line, "You wear sainthood with such humility and grace" makes me think of a sinister preacher seeking to manipulate the masses in mind and spirit. It captures falsehood nicely.

I really like this line, "Shriek your obscenities, oh bird of prey." So emotional and intense.

I feel like the word "hammered" could be replaced with "stitched" or "glued" or "pasted" since you're talking about dolls and masks. You can have that word connect with the manufacture of dolls or masks.

In this line, "And with thirty bright coins you’re bought and sold," why did you write a specific number?

I also really like this line, "Scream your invectives, sharpen your blade./The façade crumbles…the demon rumbles." The first line is so intense and emotional again. They make me think of a monster. Saying, "the demon rumbles" makes me think this behavior is definitely habitual and a way of life for this person.

Interesting poem.

Thanks for posting! Have a great day!



Posted 11 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ReedWrite

11 Months Ago

Thank you so much for your in-depth review, Jazz. Quite insightful. I appreciate you taking time to .. read more
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FIN
I thought this to be awesome and well-played out. The pace as well to be nicely written. I love it.

Posted 11 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ReedWrite

11 Months Ago

Thank you very much.
Glad you enjoyed it.
Love, love, love this one.... Well written and razor sharp Pam. Great job! This is my favorite, so far. :)

Posted 11 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ReedWrite

11 Months Ago

Hey Misty!
Thank you so much. Appreciate that very much.
Big hug, my friend.
M. L. F.

11 Months Ago

This one is really good! Enjoyed reading it, no problem.. :)
Big hugs back Pam.. :)
There are very few who are straight - they show a different face to different people (who hasn't laughed too heartily at a boss's joke in front of a spouse/partner only to have them look as if they don't know who you are?) but then there are those who take it to a whole other level.
This needed to be said. It was said. I hope it did you good ReedWrite. It felt good to read.

Posted 11 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ReedWrite

11 Months Ago

Thank you, Tony.
I'm not sure if felt good to write...but you're right...it needs to be said... read more
Scary and real emotion inside this one!

Well done on the subject of changing personalities --in private.
To be revealed over time.

Posted 11 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ReedWrite

11 Months Ago

Thank you Josie. Appreciate the read and review.
Josie E. Cook M. A.

11 Months Ago

You are welcome!
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...
Reminds me of an ex even the ken doll face...lol, he had a public face and then a private one.....extreme
opposites. People like that can be soul destroying. Powerful kick a*s write. Cheers Starz

Posted 11 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ReedWrite

11 Months Ago

Thank you Starzy! Appreciate you taking time to read and comment.
i wouldn't change a thing ..i enjoy the rhyming ...and the commentary (i apply to abuse) is stinging and sadly true ... your poem also reminds me of some pastors i have known ... as well as my own hypocrisy ..easy to show our best little face in public ..but the rubber hits the gravel on every road ... we (humanity) can do better
E.

Posted 11 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ReedWrite

11 Months Ago

Hugs you tight.
Thank you, Einstein.
Appreciate your comment very much.

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Added on October 31, 2016
Last Updated on November 3, 2016
Tags: Duplicity, deceit, facades

Author

ReedWrite
ReedWrite

Omaha, NE



About
After a decade trapped by distractions, I'm pursuing my passion once again. I come from a military background...a Navy brat...and my father (now deceased) and brother, are both published writers...so .. more..

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