Loneliness

A friend asked me to write this and I tried to let it flow.... but the poet in me just can't let go...

Loneliness: My story

 

            Do you know what loneliness truly is? I do. It’s waking up in the middle of the night reaching and seeking something you’ll never feel. Hating going home at night knowing you’ll face a lonely room, in a lonely house, in a lonely world. It never gets easy for you to cope even when you think you’ve fallen in love because loneliness teaches you differently. It shows you that nobody truly loves you or gives a damn about your mere existence.

            I was told I’m being unfair for thinking there was no one that cared. Am I? Not really. If anyone cared then why are there no ears to hear me? I just know of emotions to fear me and no joys to cheer me. I get this way a lot. Pursuing companionship in what I think is real and crying tears I refused to feel praying that time would heal…. Me. Do you feel me?

            I don’t wish this pain to anyone in this world even though I know I’m just one of many sad and lonely girls. How do I release the anger to heal myself for the moment? I lust as a way to console it. I’ve been worst. I used to hurt people just because I was hurting and I wanting them to feel what I was feeling. All my revenge turned sideways and killed the progress of my healing.

            Now I don’t know what to do to make me feel complete. I eat and think, and eat and sleep. Sometimes I cry but that makes me feel weak. I can’t let the world see the lonely weep. I was supposed to be telling you a story of my loneliness hoping for the best. But it turned into poetic chant thanks to the lack of loneliness I feel when I read your text….. ~Puppet of fate~

 

~Reeses~