Playground

Watch your memories when they come out to play

My memories came out to play ~

 

They climbed the jungle gym

and let the swings carry them

to soaring heights of elation

 

They ran the track

at lightning speed,

and passed the baton

from one to the other

 

Then down the long, slick slide they slid

          landing hard

in the gravel…

 

If you let your memories

out to play,

 

expect some tears.

 

Author's Note

Just thinking about how a joyful memory can lead to a sad one...

Reviews

[SyberRose]

I like that term...yes its nice to let them come out and play...always bittersweet...I loved this Rita...:)

[Rita L. Sev]

Thank you, Rose!

[Baby Ricochet]

That is true about memories. They go every which way.

[Rita L. Sev]

Yes, they do. Sometimes it takes us by surprise. Thanks for reading!

[Samuel Dickens]

Your meaning might be a bit different than the one I find, but I certainly know the spirit of it.

[Rita L. Sev]

Thank you for reading, Sam - I'd love to know your take on it. That's the point of art - everyone sees something different.

[Samuel Dickens]

Age and bad health, Rita. I used to be athletic and very active, but now I'm a Jabba the Hut. It's so frustrating when the spirit is saying "Get up, let's go! Gotta mow the yard, change the oil, get to work on that painting, take a 200 mile motorcycle ride!" and I tell it, "Whoa, let's just go grocery shopping, then take a nap."

[Rita L. Sev]

Memories of what we once were, tied into what we could once do. I understand that - and these too are joyful and painful at the same time. Thank you, Sam, for helping me to see more.

[Marie]

I don't let my memories out. I don't like the tears.

[Rita L. Sev]

Sometimes, I don't either. Other times I don't see it coming... Thanks for reading.

[Chris]

Life as we live it.

[Rita L. Sev]

Yep. Thanks for stopping by, Chris!

[Chris]

It was a good day for "apples"

[Casner P]

Connecting the playground and memories in general instantly made me think of MY own memories. If this was your intention this was a very smart way of doing it. If that was not your intention, this is still a very smartly written poem. I enjoyed it :)

[Rita L. Sev]

Thank you, Casner! My intention is always - let the poem take you where it will! Glad you enjoyed!

[Gobinder Singh Dhindsa]

Really Very Good work. Pen On. Do u read mine to Time, Anguish and Why?

[Rita L. Sev]

Thank you, Lucky! I'll check out your poem today.

[Gobinder Singh Dhindsa]

Most welcome

[Zahra]

an amazing piece, memories can make us happy and sad at the same time. Very nicely done.

[Rita L. Sev]

Thank you, Voice!

[James Hanna-Magill]

Dear Rita

You are overdue a visit. So I thought I'd come and see what you are up to at the moment.

I picked this from the top of your list and immediately related.

I'll do a review in loosely numbered points this time.

1) Your structure is an unusual one, unique. You place the words on the page in a manner of your own choosing. The stanzas are of irregular length - as long as they take to make your point.

You inset the lines of the main stanzas other than the first. You punctuate at whim, sometimes leaving out full stops at the end of sentences, only for one at the end. I have this personal thing about punctuation. Do it fully throughout or not at all. You do a mix and match.

You choose not to rhyme.

There is a rhythm to the poem but at times a little irregular.

I guess this falls into the category of free or blank verse.

Other than my personal preference about punctuation, it works for me!

2) Use of English and allusion: You keep your language simple as befits the poem.

But you have plenty of allusion running round it.

You have the gym, the athletics track relay race and a children's playground slide.

They gel well together.

3) Meaning: Not hard to find. You mostly keep your poems transparent. And the opening quotes and author's note help.

It feels very like my poem 'For Simplicity's Sake' and my own lines there:

'However much benighted we seek out places we once lived excited.
There is as much mischief there we would also have to share.'

4) Impact and favourite lines: The notion of memory is a mixed bag for us all. Some are pleasant, but if we look hard enough, or even in the subconscious of our nightmares, the unpleasant and unforgiving of the past may pop up in the same search. The lurking demons.

Daphne du Maurier's Rebecca is my favourite novel and Hitchcock's rendition in his film with Sir Lawrence Oliver and Joan Fontaine my favourite film.

There are lines from the script of the film, which relate both to this piece and mine. They are:

Unnamed heroine: You know, I, I wish there,could be an invention, that bottled up the memory like perfume. And it never faded,never got stale. Then whenever I wanted to, I could uncork the bottle, and live the memory all over again.

Max de Winter: And what particular moment would you want to keep?

Unnamed heroine: Oh, all of them, all these last few days. I feel as though I'd, I'd collected a whole shelf full of bottles.

Max de Winter: Sometimes, you know, those little bottles contain demons, that have a way of popping out at you, just as you're trying most desperately to forget.

Sorry for the two references. But this is my personal emotional response to the powerful message your poem brings.

My favourite lines from your poem? The last:

'Then down the long, slick slide they slid
landing hard
in the gravel…
If you let your memories
out to play,
expect some tears.'

The sentiment of all I have said.

5) Overview: A gentle piece of free verse packed full of meaning.

Bravo!

Your friend


James

[Rita L. Sev]

Thank you, James, for this thorough review! I actually share your opinion about punctuation (it's the English teacher in me) and will have to fix that mix - I should never post late at night! This poem is not my usual style, but it seems to be a format that I follow when I am going for a more serious message. I will be by your pages soon - the school year is winding down, and I will have more time to read and review.

[James Hanna-Magill]

I'm glad all is well with you Rita. I always come over to your page out of fascination and knowing I am going to find something that appeals to me, Your friend. James