jumped

there's a way to reach some of our dreams, but not easy, things worth having require great effort adding to their value

tried to shatter the smoked glass
that separates me from you
seeing only dimly,
jumped as hard as i could

could not touch the moon!
i jumped into a puddle
still, could not land on the clouds!

i only got wet to my crotch
got knocked down, 
off another humiliation’s notch

still will i try
never stop trying to fly!

i took punches in the dark
but only broke my hand
to the sounds of jeers 
hiding somewhere all around 
in the shadows of broad daylight
formless, disembodied beings 
gutting my mind
spilling my love, trampling waste
harbingers - despair’s broken shell  
 
proud though to no avail
i took a stand
shouted out a command
for this internal strife to cease
only to watch my tears 
disappeared, falling down
into the swirling sand beneath my feet

i spoke inside, did not hide
the rains fell, tears crystallized
off the sand - materialized
turned to joy
unseen hand

the jeers silenced
soft wings of words lifted me up
i touched the clouds
gathered my wits, from broken bits
what was left of love’s ashen heap
jumped up reached for the sky
prayed i might touch heaven’s gate
this time i did