Lost Child

Lost Child

A Poem by SRS_Writer
"

A poem of a person searching to find out who they are because of hurt and turmoil they have endured

"

Lost child, lost child
bruised from lack of love
scarred from abandonment
searching to find oneself
why was I put here?

 

only feel pain
can only see hate
feels like im going insane
so much I have endured

 

so young
but had to grow up so fast
have to defend myself
cause no one else would

 

lost child, lost child
bruised from lack of love
scarred from abandonment
searching to find oneself
why was I put here?

 

tears
mind full of fear
crying
but no water is falling from my eyes

 

they use me
they abuse me
stripped me of self worth
i'm living but inside i'm dying
misguided and confused
why am I put on this earth?

 

lost child, lost child
bruised from lack of love
scarred from abandonment
searching to find oneself
why was I put here?

 

By: Shaudae Smith

© 2010 SRS_Writer


My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register




Featured Review

'scard' should be 'scarred.'

Otherwise, the repetition in this is absolutely fantastic. If I could give advice, I would say that I would make it a new stanza before every single 'lost child, lost child.' That would make that repetition stand out even more. After "cause no one else would" and "why am I put on this earth," put in an extra line, making separate paragraphs, and you'd be golden.

Well written, very strong.

E.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Thank you alley howell i really do need to pay ateention to my diction and spelling because it does change the meaning of the poem. Thank you for bringing that to my attention.

Posted 14 Years Ago


Thank you for the advice. I had the poem written in stanzas but didnt realize my format changed when i copied and paste. Thank you for bringing that to my attention Elijah J.

Posted 14 Years Ago


'scard' should be 'scarred.'

Otherwise, the repetition in this is absolutely fantastic. If I could give advice, I would say that I would make it a new stanza before every single 'lost child, lost child.' That would make that repetition stand out even more. After "cause no one else would" and "why am I put on this earth," put in an extra line, making separate paragraphs, and you'd be golden.

Well written, very strong.

E.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Okay, its good. But first off, you should go back and recheck all your spelling, i.e= "eath" earth... If words arn't spelled wright the poem losses its meaning. And make sure the words you put in your pieces are actual words. But like i said, its good, just fix those little things and it will be better.

Posted 14 Years Ago


0 of 1 people found this review constructive.


Share This
Email
Facebook
Twitter
Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


Stats

669 Views
4 Reviews
Rating
Added on February 8, 2010
Last Updated on February 8, 2010
Tags: Lost, Child, love, abandonement, pain, searching, bruised

Author

SRS_Writer
SRS_Writer

VA



About
Hi. My name is Shaudae. I enjoy writing. I would love to hear feedback on my writing pieces. Constructive criticism is greatly appreciated because I want to become a stronger writer. I hope you enjoy .. more..

Writing