beneath the surface

beneath the surface

A Poem by xSamilynnx
"

its an idea for a song.... i dont have a tune yet though...

"

Im nothing to all of you

Dont lie I know its true

Im out of place,

Dude i gave you space

Why cant any of you see

see who i am, see the real me

Before im hung up in that tree

Im gonna try to be set free

 

Tomorrows a new day

I would pray

But its not gonna help me anyway

Im just a  little blonde stray

Running away

Running through the day

 

Ive been hurt

All the guys

They just like to flirt

They call me baby

But inside

Im screaming save me

Save me

Im not just a maybe

 

Tomorrows a new day

I would pray

But its not gonna help me anyway

Im just a little blonde stray

Running through the day

Running through the gray

 

Im done with this s**t

Im gonna kick and hit

You smile and get higher

I drop the match and start the fire

I laugh at your pain

You call me insane

Dont try to change my mind

Im leaving you for them to find

 

"things will get better" psh screw that

Everybody always treats me like a door mat

I hide everything with a smile

Everything gathers up in a pile

You're not mad, bull s**t

Thats why i threw a bitchfit

Turn my friends against me

Why cant you just f*****g leave me be

 

Tomorrows a new day

I would pray

But its not gonna help me anyway

Im just a little blonde stray

Running away

Running through the day

Running through the gray

 

There is no tomorrow

Todays my last day

Smile and say

goodbye little stray

Im gonna pray

For a better place to stay

for a better place to stay

© 2012 xSamilynnx


Author's Note

xSamilynnx
i gotta say for my first song its pretty good.... thats for all the wonderful comments glad u guys like it... made some changes to the 2nd verse, 4th versue (one with the match and starting the fire) the 5th verse and last verse (?) hope u guys like it

THERE ARE CUSS WIRDS.... YOUNG KIDS BE WARNED

My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register




Featured Review

This should absolutely be set to music! I just love these lyrics :D The rhythm's great, too, and you even have an amazing chorus.....looks like most of it is ready to be turned into a song :) And about the title, (I usually suck at making up titles, but what the hell) I noticed that there are some lines that say that people don't know who you really are, so the first thing that crossed my mind is something like "Beneath the surface". But that may not be a good title, since it doesn't quite fit in with the chorus. So if the title needs to be chorus- oriented, then I would go with something like "What tomorrow holds". But as I said, I'm not good at making up titles. XD

Posted 12 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

I agree with you that esp. for a first song this is very good and I would love to see it set to music. It had a few cool line runs in it like:

"But inside
Im screaming save me
Save me
Im not just a maybe"

which is an awesome grouping itself. I didn't read it before the changes so I can't really comment on that other than that I think it reads perfectly now and I would love to one day hear it as a song and not just read it too.

Posted 12 Years Ago


I can definitely see this as a song. I love the chorus ""Running through the day/Running through the gray..."

I think most kids have heard these words.

Posted 12 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

this was amazing i loved it u need to make it into a song id be the first to get it :) amazing like so amazing

Posted 12 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

I can relate so much to your words that they actually brought tears to my eyes. screw 15. lovely lyrics, x

Posted 12 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

nice poem reminds me so much of the truth of life

Posted 12 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

[send message][befriend] Subscribe
lei
it's beautiful... but sad.. And yes there's tomorrow and a smile t share... hang on!

Posted 12 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

:D beautiful!

Posted 12 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

i love the lines:
I drop the match and start the fire
I laugh at your pain
You call me insane
But you dont change my mind
Im leaving you for them to find

There is a real stregnth in this :) Great job!



Posted 12 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

This is really good, the feeling within it is very strong. I know how this feels

Posted 12 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

This was really good... Great job... Well done!!!

Posted 12 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.


First Page first
Previous Page prev
1
Share This
Email
Facebook
Twitter
Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


Stats

350 Views
12 Reviews
Rating
Added on March 2, 2012
Last Updated on March 5, 2012

Author

xSamilynnx
xSamilynnx

thornton, CO



About
im 15 years old favotire poem:goodbye my angel dear by tyler phillps (it was in a chicken soop for the teenage soul book) favorite song lyrics- "what a beautiful smile can it stay for a while on t.. more..

Writing
the queen the queen

A Poem by xSamilynnx


i am i am

A Poem by xSamilynnx


Death Death

A Poem by xSamilynnx



Related Writing

People who liked this story also liked..


Sleep Sleep

A Poem by xSamilynnx