The rhythm of depression

My depression

Cutting myself is tempting
But I won't give in.
I will find a way to compete with the urges.
I will be a fighter, right?

7 months without incident

Why do I try anymore?
The days in theses months are all circulating the hours from the days before with no end.

I can't uses these same battle strategies to fight and win my every war.
It's not working anymore.
Like the medication you've taken for too long, and your body grows immune towards its effects.

Writing theses same stories and listening to theses same songs time and time again has lost all means of help to me.

Why does life have to be so redundant? With the same patterns and scenarios.

Much like the scars on my body, once again reopening with new blood to be shed.
With new tears of sorrow to be felt falling from my eyes, down my cheeks, from my face, and into my lap.
Where my tears mix with the blood of my guilt and pain, sting my open wounds with the salt. Oh how I hate pity my very existence, I think as I reopen another scar after another

Day 1 without incident

Reviews

[Sir Drift & Mr. Pulse]

Life surely does walk in circles, loops and mirrors, but then there's us, who path life towards an alternate ending. If there is any pain out there, it is submitting to routine.

[LightDarkMask]

Although i cannot completely grasp the self harm feeling , however, i do understand the agonizing and torturous mental pain and despair, i've been through tough times myself :( .
Amazing writing in general :)

[Sammie Sanchez]

Thank you so much for the review. I actually was having a relapse when I wrote this. And I'm ashamed but I will fight through this. Thanks again

[Kumala]

This really touched me. I can relate to this so well and it's comforting to see it being expressed so simply yet agonisingly at the same time. Beautiful.

[Sammie Sanchez]

Thank you, been going through a tough time right now. So this one felt natural to write.

[Kumala]

You certainly expressed your pain and I feel it with you.

[Sammie Sanchez]

Thank you again