Destructive

What is with all these things I do?

Self destructive behaviors that leave me reeling

From blow upon blow to my soul

Why do I do this?

What is wrong with me?

A thousand questions like sandpapers

Killing me with indecision and anger

Utter destruction of what is whole and good

Leaving me a shell of what I could have been

Craving things I shouldn't have

Wishing for an end to the suffering I cause

Maybe I should just disappear?

Leave and never return?

But I cannot do that

That would hurt too bad

Hurt too many

Life seems like a grey dull cloud

Of utter despair

There are no cares when you have no reason to live

And less reason to die

Why did it all happen?

Why was I born?

All these things dragging me down

Perhaps there is a reason for it

Perhaps not

All I know

Is that there isn't enough heart to go around

And everything these people demand

Destroys me

Completely 

Author's Note

Just something I wrote thinking about the destructive behaviors of an addict. Please tell me what you think :)

Reviews

[Star Wolf]

An awesome write. The emotional pain almost screams from the page. It seems there is never an answer to these painful questions. One must live and learn, somehow find their way in this cold world.. How sad is that? I don't know.

[Seth DeAlba]

Thank you very much, I am glad you enjoyed it. :)

[Star Wolf]

You're very welcome.