Dying Inside

Eh.. Just something I wrote a while back.

The tears kept coming,
They wouldn't stop

I hugged my stomach,
And rocked back and forth

The tears still flowing,
I got up and ran,
Looking for someone to hold

Rain was pouring,
My tears were streaming,
I was running,
I was screaming

I fell down and cried,
I started to writhe,
On the ground in pain.
I wanted to get away,
But I couldn't

What was wrong?
What was happening?
I was dying inside

Author's Note

Second poem I've ever written. Is it good?

Reviews

[Havatara]

In the third stanza "I got up and ran,
Looking for someone to hold"
I didn't really think their was a good flow. You just sorta cut it off. I also did not understand the separation of the stanzas. The end of each stanza needs a period as well. So you have to edit a bit. Other than that I got the meaning and I enjoyed reading it.

[Tas]

Yeah you still have some technical things to get but it was ok

[anneliese]

this isn't a bad poem but not the best one i've ever read. its a good start! i do have to say that the way you spelled 'tearz' bothered me a bit. once again, this was a very good start and dont stop writing!!