Fragility

Fragility

A Poem by Kristallo

She withered, 
A paled Botticelli demure
Her mind eggshell thin and
 littered
With pieces of you
Haunted by halos 
Cluttered in yesterday's honey gaze
Still Blinder than hell
Cursing her love as a prison cell
She eclipsed, 

lightning crash, waking stars
As willows shiver, winter sighs 
This moon kissed momentary escape 
Calls bullshit to zen
In great billowing clouds of pewter
The past is circulating
We two are Oklahoma bold
Sweltering lovely, while you boast the cold
Like Shakespearian tragedies,
Her pages are growing old.

To crackle and cry like dead leaves
On the eve of nostalgia,
Time is dripping mad cursive,
And age never lies
It wanes, eventually dies...
Pooled in midnight mellow
She's weathering the range,
Of your lightning bolt gazes
Temporal passion phases.
Crawling in shotgun shells,
Each casing a promise
Your words are ember stings
I can't grasp what hope means
When hope unravels 
And nothing is as it seems.


Chased by the echoes of waking dream
Her life fragile as the curve
Of a butterfly's wing. 
What does it all mean?



© 2015 Kristallo



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~~ painful experiences expressed in beautiful poetry... ~~ for me... this is about a tormented mind delving into the depths of another tormented mind... desperately trying to ascertain... somehow... if... the existential aspirations of two human beings collide or blend... ~~ and... the intensity of vulnerability expressed in this piece is overwhelming... ~~ it's hard to write about something as fragile as fragility... but you excel in expressing yourself... ~~ excellent work...

Posted 2 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

"Ghost's crowd the young child's fragile eggshell mind"…Jim.
Once you hit "We two are Oklahoma bold" this poem really takes its stride like a galloping thunderous stampede and never relinquishes the point of fragility.
There is a serious unraveling beyond hope in this with such intense lines and with your use of rhyming that pushes the hooves of awkward understanding onward like a gathering storm. You get angry and then you turn, first to sadness and then to introspective reflection of the attack followed by a change in tense. +The shotgun shell cases becoming promises.

I think a point worth making here is your change in personal tense from the start to finish. You begin in passive voice "She withered" and then you switch to an active aggressive "It wanes , eventually dies…." Not quite sure why you change but you add more mystery to the piece by doing so.
Where the past was an issue at the beginning it eventually is abandoned and brings the reader to the collapse of not only her fragility but his as well. Not at all that easy and very well executed.
I kept coming here and seeing that same poetry. I am completely heart filled alone to find you back but to see you reaching to walk on water as well..Wonderful C.









Posted 2 Years Ago


[send message][befriend] Subscribe
.
~~ painful experiences expressed in beautiful poetry... ~~ for me... this is about a tormented mind delving into the depths of another tormented mind... desperately trying to ascertain... somehow... if... the existential aspirations of two human beings collide or blend... ~~ and... the intensity of vulnerability expressed in this piece is overwhelming... ~~ it's hard to write about something as fragile as fragility... but you excel in expressing yourself... ~~ excellent work...

Posted 2 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Added on June 11, 2015
Last Updated on June 11, 2015

Author

Kristallo
Kristallo

Denton, TX



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I found I could say things with color and shapes that I couldn't say any other way - things I had no words for. Georgia O'Keeffe All paid jobs absorb and degrade the mind. -Aristotle Th.. more..

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