The Disclosure

A story about a woman's confrontation with her man about her feelings and their relationship...

     It was raining by the time she arrived at their meeting place. She felt depressed since November.

 

     She sighed. It's been a month and she should tell him the things that were bothering her like her feelings about him, about herself and most importantly, about their relationship. As she was waiting patiently in the small Chinese restaurant near Johnny's office, she was reminiscing about the past months that they shared together.

 

     Julie, a strong-willed, independent, kind-hearted and smart young woman, was new in the school where
Johnny was working as a part time tutor before he joined the other company. Julie was hired as a pre-school teacher. By that time, she was still nursing a broken heart when she met him.

 

     It was her first week when a colleague introduced them to each other. Jphnny was not a real hunk, if you based on Julie's criteria. He's a guy whom you could be friends with easily, which was not appealing for her sometimes. But this guy, it moved her in some way which she could not explain. She looked at his eyes... His eyes were beautiful as if he could speak to her through them. Julie unconcsciously kept on staring at Johnny while he did the same way.

 

     Julie was the first one who broke the gaze. She realized she was standing in front of the class and immediately looked for a vacant chair. Johnny was sitting at the teacher's table talking to Sharon, the lead teacher of the third grade class. As usual, Julie was shy and didn't talk to them. She just sat and talked with the students. She was doing this when Johnny asked her about something that she forgot what was all about. This was their first encounter. As the days passed, she and Macky saw each other a lot in school and they even ate breakfast together. Their co-teachers didn't know that they were sending SMS to each other for days now. Julie was happy like this in her life.

 

     On the other side of this situation, there was another guy. His name was Nathan. He was a part-time tutor in the school, too. Just like Johnny. He was older than her and was assertive in expressing his feelings for her. Nathan was really nice and all but he was not just her type... and she was starting to like Macky everyday. Nathan was also sending SMS to her on her cellphone and begging her for a friendly date. Julie was not the kind of person who would go out on a date and let the other expecting for more so she let down the offer before it became complicated. During this stage with Nathan, she and Johnny were going out on a date already. Nathan and Johnny were friends too and she sensed sometimes that Nathan was jealous of him.

 

     Weeks passed and their relationship.. or was it friendship... was getting stronger. She and Johnny were going out and he surprised her by giving things like a bracelet and a stuffed toy. She was starting to fall in love with him. She wasn't expecting that she would feel like this. One Thursday evening, she emailed Johnny. In her email, she told him, if what was happening between them was not the one she was thinking, maybe they could end this up before either of them get hurt. She also told him that she was in a situation like this for several times and nobody caught her during the fall.

 

     Johnny replied by saying she could rely on him because he would catch her when she fall. This made Julie happy and secured for the first time in her life. She even thought that she already found the person to spend her life with. At the end of his email, Johnny put the date when they first kissed under his signature.

 

     She was very happy and for the first time felt like she was really a woman. They became an item and their fellow teachers noticed a change between them. They told Julie that she looked very happy and they noticed that there was a spark when their eyes locked. Of course, they made love for the first time during their first monthsary and also the following months. Until...

 

     It was October that year when Julie felt something changed. She had this "premonition" that they would not last up to their first year anniversary. She couldn't explain it but this was true. She felt depressed as the days go by. She felt that there's something wrong with their relationship, with her... with him. He forgot their monthsary for the third time and this really irritated her. She also felt that they were both trying hard to keep the relationship but it only made her more depressed. If you were going to ask if they fought, they weren't. This made Julie think. Was this a good sign or not? She just let the moment slipped for one whole month. When one day...

 

     Julie asked Johnny if they could watch a movie next Friday and he agreed. She was planning to spend  quality time with him; to analyze what was wrong with them.

 

    Friday came and suddenly Johnny announced that he was going some place else. Julie got angry and told him that he should go ahead. Besides, he would be late and his "friends" were waiting for him. When he left, she cried because of anger. Later that night, she sent an SMS to him telling if they could have a serious talk in person about them.

 

     This was the reason why she was at this Chinese restaurant waiting for him. It was almost half an hour that she waiting when he sat in front of her. He smiled sheepishly at her. She softened at his smile. She really loved him but this was not the time to melt under his eyes. She told him straightaway, "I don't care if you will hurt me or not. Just tell me the truth. Do you still love me or not?

 

     He looked away and answered,"I can't say at this moment if I still love you or not."

 

     "Why?"

 

     "It's like falling in love, Julie. You don't know why you fall in love with a person. Same goes with falling out of love. It just happened." He looked at her. She just stared at him. Her thoughts were stirring with possibilities why he was telling this to her. She couldn't shake the feeling that there was someone else.

 

     "Was there something that I did or did not do that you feel like this," Julie asked. She knew she sounded like she was begging him to stay but she needed to ask this not for him but for herself.

 

     "No, it isn't you, Julie. It's me," Johnny answered.

 

     She shook her head in disbelief and said,"I'm sorry. I'm just being logical here. It's impossible that you feel this way without any reason. Now, tell me the truth. Is there somebody else? Are you waiting for somebody or it's just that. It's gone?"

 

     Johnny was thinking... or was he just acting? She felt that he was just acting. "It's just that. It's gone."

 

     She shook her head in disbelief again. "Sorry. It's just impossible that there is no reason for it..."

 

     She left the restaurant with questions inside her head. She knew he was not telling her truth. Why? She told him that she didn't care if it hurt her or not. Who was that person? Did she knew this third party? What would she do now?

 

     A sudden thought had hit her. She didn't care! She didn't care if there was another girl besides her and whether she knew her or not. She's not being bitter or something but she felt free for the first time. Of course, she wouldn't deny that she was hurt and she would cry because they had spent time together than she had with her previous dates. She knew this would happen. But it left her lessons that she could use in her future relationships. No doubt about it.

 

     She stood at the bus stop feeling hurt and a new person at the same time. It rained again. She didn't bother to open her umbrella. She let the rain poured on her. She looked up as tears came streaming down on her cheeks. She saw the moon and how it shone brightly on her then she smiled.

 

    

    

Author's Note

grammar, opinions, etc.

Reviews

[Jessica O.]

Very well written. Great job!

[Evil_Angel]

F*ck boys!!! Ok i'm not lesbian, and excuse my language but GOD when they say that crap "its not you its me..." UGH WHAT THE HELL IS THAT? Sorry very bitter lolll.... I liked your descriptions, this seems very real somehow, the characters definitely come to life. There are a few little grammar errors here and there, like in the beginning:

It's been a month and she should tell him now things that were bother her like her feelings about him,

Should be bothering not bother. Not a big deal though. I love the thoughts of each of your charcters, how you portray both of their emotions and just...general feelings. I definitely can sympathize with what this chick is going through, I think that is why I liked it so much. Very good job :)