Vacancy

Everyday that follows

Gives birth to less hope.

Every morning I try on

A new soul

Because the one I dressed myself

Yesterday,

Or the moon before

Has grown old

And oh so tired

With my groans

As well as moans…

There are no need for clothes

Because my heart is

Bare,

Naked,

OPEN!

But every night the sign reads as closed

And there’s really no

Reason why my heart is this vacant...

Reviews

[wordman]

but soon the wind will blow cleaning out that dust from rust
a new love will come along,and you will be singing a new song

[sinNsincerity]

I hope room service doesn't kick me out too soon hehe
Thank you Ron! Have a blessed one.

[Asante]

This was EERILY similar to things that I'd write. I loved the s**t out of this piece, dude.
Strong metaphors to capture feelings that I know I can personally relate to. This is strong, one of my favorites now. Great working, bro.

[sinNsincerity]

I hate to use clichés, but great minds do think alike.
Thank you bro, I really appreciate that!

[zaisham9393]

I loved the poem, and also the metaphors you used.Thank you for sharing this :)!

[sinNsincerity]

Thank you so much Zaisha, that means so much!

[zaisham9393]

My pleasure my friend :))!

[Fahmida Mehreen]

I like the simplicity of this poem. The metaphors are powerful enough to create a strong imagery. Indeed, it is a food for thought. Everyday we spend so much to give ourselves the best look. But inside our heart is naked with raw emotions. Yet still, in the middle of those sentiments lie an unfulfilled barrenness.

A good read. :)

[sinNsincerity]

I always enjoy hearing what comes to your mind Fahmida

[Fahmida Mehreen]

Thank you for your appreciation. Best wishes.

[sinNsincerity]

Best wishes and more to you as well.

[Polly]

This is beautiful! I love the raw emotions you portrayed through this, I truly enjoyed. The only thing that you can improve is the awkward line breaks. If you happen to write these same sentences in a paragraph, it wouldn't sound like a poem at all. The places that stood out to me the most that you can work on are

'Because the one I dressed myself
Yesterday'

and

'But every night the sign reads as closed
And there’s really no
Reason why my heart is this vacant'

This was still an amazing read. Good job and keep it up. :)

[sinNsincerity]

But I love awkward moments...

[Polly]

I meant awkward line breaks. xD You can fix them by adding rhymes or something to them.

[sinNsincerity]

That's what I meant as well. When the rhythm and flow breaks, it makes the reader think what they hell just happened? And then they really have to pay attention to what's really going on beneath the surface...

[Polly]

Ah, alright, that's a nice way of thinking.

[Nadia Gerassimenko]

That was very novel and out of this world yet earthly because this implicates raw human emotions of fatigue for constantly swapping souls that deplete in energy and for having an eternally vacant heart in this heartbreak hotel.

[sinNsincerity]

Yes! You said it quite well actually.
Thank you for reading Nadia!

[Real Inspiration]

I never would have compared Clothes to my Soul. However, now I would. This makes so much sense, it's incredible. Touching, really.

[sinNsincerity]

Thank you for enjoying my cleverness =D
It was a fun write and I'm happy that other people have found an
other perspective when soul searching...

[National Acrobat]

Nice job man! I need to write 25 characters there we go ! Awesome!

[sinNsincerity]

Thank you for reading.

[GreenEyedPoet]

Great metaphor of clothes and a soul, I love that!
Awesome write Sin. :]

[sinNsincerity]

Thank you for reading.
I'm glad you loved it!

[nazia]

Clothes and soul.. who thought these two words could be used in such a way. You always surprise me with your metaphors David. Nicely penned :)

[sinNsincerity]

That's how I interpret soul searching in my mind =D
Thank you so much Nazia!