I really wouldn't mind....

I really wouldn't mind....

if my breath would slow down to a halt,

my heart to stop beating completely,

for my depression to not see another day,

to sleep forever in a coffin...

cause at least I'd finally be at peace.

 

No, I truly wouldn't mind...if I lied down for one last time and didn't wake up.

I would love to take a final breath and DIE.

Reviews

[Relic]

I've been there, every time something bad happens I go back to those gloomy thoughts. I'd rather figure out a way to change my thinking and become more able to handle things but it takes time. I agree with dw817 though.

I had a good friend that committed suicide last year. It leaves quite a mess for family members not to mention the horrible feelings of grief, dread and depression that's past on to them. Hope you feel better soon.

[Dreamer]

thank you very much for your comments...

[Relic]

You're welcome.

[Silent Wolf]

Honestly, this describes me so very well, though I know that is a bad thing... But at the same time, I don't want people to die... So much conflicting emotions...

[Dreamer]

I'm sorry that describes you like it does me. It is indeed a terrible feeling.

[Silent Wolf]

Yes, yes it is. Very much so. :/

[Quiet Child]

no, no, no... no review because you already know.

[Dreamer]

um, yes I know what you have to say on the matter but it doesn't change anything.

[Quiet Child]

say so yourself, your mind knows different.

[Dreamer]

my mind doesn't know different...

[Quiet Child]

maybe you're thinking of a more masochistic difference, but yes your mind certainly knows different.

[Dreamer]

I want to die... end of story

[Quiet Child]

quite a manipulative mind you've got there.

[Dreamer]

um..yep.......

[Quiet Child]

you have no idea

[Dreamer]

i have no idea about what?

[Quiet Child]

hmm, think and you'll figure it out. lol.

[Dreamer]

doubt it..

[Quiet Child]

you will, don't worry.

[dw817]

⊰ℛℛ⊱
I know I've mentioned this before but perhaps it bears repeating. Dreamer, suicide is a long-term solution for a short-term problem.

Think of depression as a rainstorm. It doesn't rain every day does it ? Sure it can rain off and on, that's our mood going up and down, bipolar, many times you can't control it.

But you can recognize when it does change and take the proper measures. If you know you are going to have a down day, just take it easy. Don't lay out a whole assignment you feel you have to complete, no - just do what you are comfortable with.

And if you are feeling suicidal, and we have all been there. Hold off on it for TOMORROW. See if you feel the same way TOMORROW. Because like a rainstorm, the more it rains, the less water there is in the sky (tears from your eyes), and the more stable you will be then.

If it's especially bad and you know you don't need to do anything important today, take a Melatonin. It's an over-the-counter tranquilizer that is quite strong. Lie down for several hours. You'll always feel better when you wake up later.

And take care of yourself. As Dr. McCoy once told Kirk,

"In this galaxy, there's a mathematical probability of three million Earth-type planets. And in all of the universe, three million million galaxies like this. And in all of that and perhaps more, only one of each of us."

"Don't destroy the one named Kirk."

And Kirk in this case being you, gentle Dreamer ... If you want to talk in PM about anything, you know where to find me. :)

[Dreamer]

Thanks a lot for your comments/suggestions, David. However, I feel this way just about every day...some days just a lot worse than others....
Suicidal? yeah... I am that for sure.
Waiting?...I've been waiting, I'm still here aren't I?
I'm sick of waiting....

[Sami Khalil]

Wow. I hope things will look better...A very good poem...:)............

[Dreamer]

thanks...I doubt they will though.

[Sami Khalil]

OK. You are welcome...:).......................

[Coyote Poetry]

A very unhappy poem. When we seek our final breathe. Not a good place to be. I hope all is well with you. Always a pleasure to read your poetry.
Coyote

[Dreamer]

I know it's an unhappy poem but it expresses how I feel. Sadly, nothing is well with me.
thanks, I appreciate you reading it.