An Errand to live for

An Errand to live for

A Poem by Suhd
"

The season of love and heartache

"
With her loaded pouch strolled spring
Through country lanes and fields fancying
the scenery of yesteryears while chewing
on basil mint that made her breath, 
the wreath of garlands adorned her ronze hair
And her eyes kept all April to themselves.
She stopped by the pond and beheld in it
Multitudes of forms of life, easy on the eye.
Later sitting upon the grassland wearing white
Cotton over-blouse, now soggy, 
her brow twinkled. She removed from her hair
The jasmine stale and tossed it down gently
Then far she gazed into the empty space
Into the cluster of aspens until mirthless
Became every twig, Until Autumn began to fiddle. 
 


© 2017 Suhd



Author's Note

Suhd
All I wanted to do was to simply depict and experiment on the sudden change in mood. Your comments and thoughts on this :)

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Zoe
Wow, how wonderfully you've depicted the change of seasons here, and along with it, change in mood as you say in your note. Loved each line. Though the last two were the best!

Posted 4 Months Ago


Suhd

4 Months Ago

You're too kind, Zoe. Thanks a lot for your time and for this nice review!
Zoe

4 Months Ago

No worries :)
The gentle, flowing rhythm and detailed description of all the plants I've never even heard of is beautiful. It creates the relaxed mood of spring. I especially like the image of her 'cotton over-blouse, now soggy', I see the dew from the night creating a soft mist over everything and making the flowers glisten.
Definitely a change of mood at the end, but you do it so seamlessly with
'Into the cluster of aspens until mirthless
Became every twig'
As the transformation into the new season takes over. I love this line so much that it almost feels that the last statement defining it as autumn is unnecessary.
Well done. I very much enjoyed it all.

Posted 5 Months Ago


Suhd

5 Months Ago

Thank you so much Emma for your kind words. They mean so much :)
Suhd

5 Months Ago

And yeah you're right about the unnecessary line. I did that because I wanted to infuse into it much.. read more
Emma

5 Months Ago

Your welcome and yes I see how the definite statement of autumn taking over adds a more sombre tone .. read more
The mood changes are part of life. We all have mood swings. But this brought out that concept very well. Nice job. It's a simple but clear poem.

Posted 11 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Suhd

5 Months Ago

Thank you so much Joanna :)
Ah!
the words here were so elegant...
i mean when i was reading this poem...i was speechless....great work duh!
keep writing.

Posted 11 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I love your descriptions of everything, it does paint a picture until 'Until autumn began to fiddle" I see you're trying to paint it happening but I might not much of a poet, the only expirience in that field was some cliche raps at school

Posted 11 Months Ago


EJHeather

11 Months Ago

'I'm not much of a poet" but I appreciate you giving me a read :D is what I meant to say
Suhd

11 Months Ago

Ah thank you so much, poetry is painting with words, so :) hahaha yeah sure I'll give your work a re.. read more
Nice! Clean, short and very sweet!


Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Dig the title. Breathless style..soft springlike. Roots of clean and real poetry. AUTHENTIC write. When I'm left thinking about it it's a good one man.

Posted 1 Year Ago


Suhd

1 Year Ago

Thanks much dude !
LostBoy

1 Year Ago

Anytime bro!
This is my favorite theme.. Writing about seasons and the change they bring. I never tire reading about them.

Thats mainly because each writer is so unique how he expresses his perspective. You my friend did amazing job in conveying your view. And the personification brings out more of the beauty though it is about heartache. Very well written.

Above you mean 'bronze hair' right?

Posted 1 Year Ago


Suhd

1 Year Ago

Appreciate the kindness Krutika :) It's ronze. It suited with the theme.
Such a beautiful piece. Humanizing the seasons, giving them life, breath. Something we so often overlook or ignore in our hast. Thanks for bringing in into such light and beauty!

Posted 1 Year Ago


Suhd

1 Year Ago

Thank you Rosalee :)
Aromatic, romantic and a truly pleasant read.
Smooth in transition and Flow.
Tender heart. Thank you for sharing.

Posted 1 Year Ago


Suhd

1 Year Ago

Thank you Anastasia...!
Anastasia Purvis

1 Year Ago

You are most welcome. x

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12 Reviews
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Added on March 26, 2017
Last Updated on July 30, 2017
Tags: nature, beauty, sad, spring, autumn, transformation, scenery

Author

Suhd
Suhd

Abbottabad, Pakistan



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A Poem by Suhd



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