Game Of Soul....

Game Of Soul....

A Poem by Surya

Unfavourable game with twists and turns
Loss and lost...studious soul without feathers
Game of desires took control, it's a 
Fairy tale of a destroyed soul...

Searched in loss, Travelled a lot
Met many who turned me a lot
Running till I lost in lot
Made a story of wanderlast soul from a lot..

Fortitude of life taught me a lot
Where greenery made my way
On trembling hills in magma of rain
Fighting till I reached a top

Tapped my feet and danced a lot
Cried and laughed, In the savage dark
I seen my soul which stayed alone.
Nothing is worth just ups and downs.

Am proud to announce, I learnt a lot....

© 2017 Surya



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Reviews

This is a really good read. It tells me that we learn a lot through hardship. Really love it.

Posted 2 Months Ago


Surya

2 Months Ago

Thank you Lily...:)
I totally agree with your message, that life can be an ongoing game where we try to preserve the integrity of our soul in the face of so many soulless attacks from all directions sometimes. I like the way you've expressed this using imagery & dynamic word choices, such as tapping feet & dancing, etc. My only drawback was the use of "a lot" at the end of so many lines -- a lame attempt to rhyme. The phrase "a lot" is really meaningless & it's better to SHOW your reader what "a lot" looks like, feels like, tastes like, sounds like, etc.

Posted 3 Months Ago


Surya

3 Months Ago

Yeah it's a lame attempt, but my intention is not to rhyme here, just to show that i learnt many fro.. read more
barleygirl

3 Months Ago

You always pick excellent messages & then you convey them clearly & powerfully! (((HUGS)))
i like this poem and the loss and lost part.

Posted 4 Months Ago


Surya

4 Months Ago

Thank you Caroline for your time stopping by..am glad you liked it..:)
This was a pleasure sir...We live and we learn.

Posted 4 Months Ago


Surya

4 Months Ago

Thank you sir....yeah we do...:)
Nice work surya ji....I loved it

Posted 4 Months Ago


Surya

4 Months Ago

Thank you then..am glad you loved i..:)
i like the 'a lot' rhyme. Lost and loss- searched in loss- a lot-lot. the expression 'magma of rain' is revealing, effect of fire and rain together. well done

Posted 5 Months Ago


Surya

5 Months Ago

Thank you for your kind words and visit....:)
Game of desires took control, it's a
Fairy tale of a destroyed soul...

you really wrote this piece so well, Surya!
keep it up

Posted 5 Months Ago


Surya

5 Months Ago

Thank you So much Rassoul..:)
This is such amazing one , i love it sooo much
How can you write that beautiful pieces ! Tell me 😂✌

Posted 5 Months Ago


Surya

5 Months Ago

Hahahaha....Thank you so much Nourhan....It just flows...:)
"Game of desires took control, it's a
Fairy tale of a destroyed soul..." Some amazing lines in this piece!

Posted 5 Months Ago


Surya

5 Months Ago

haha Thank you so much Gullia King...:)
life is definitely full of twists and turns. we tend to get lost sometimes but luckily we are able to find the right path and then continue on in our journey. and with those experiences, we learned the meaning of resiliency.and of course, i like your last line.

=>Am proud to announce, I learnt a lot....
good job! for me and for us, i guess that's the most important part. the part where you learn.

Posted 5 Months Ago


Surya

5 Months Ago

Yeah I agree, it seems important...Thank You so much L.C...:)

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Added on June 12, 2017
Last Updated on June 12, 2017

Author

Surya
Surya

Hyderabad, India



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