The possibility of you

for a friend of mine who died too soon

There was a time your words occupied 

the looseleaf carelessly thrown around my room

a time when hands intertwined so carefully 

like they always knew something was meant to break

The week you died I sifted through your love letters to me

They have a new life to them now 

I wonder what would have happened 

if I had given them a chance

Your love was too late

Your death, too soon

but I always saw the music in your smile

so I let you take me to the opera 

two youths surrounded by the old

old fashioned souls dancing on subway trains like kids

we let the car's swinging rock us to sleep and when we woke

we inhaled the night air as if it was filled with the smell of fresh-brewed coffee

invigorating, energizing, renewing, refreshing

our friendship was pure poetry

although your letters are faded they remain vibrant in my memory

your words now occupy the silence in-between heartbeats

your words will live beyond your time

Reviews

[The Verse: A Poetry Jou..]

This is certainly more impressive, you are describing a little too much, but your use of metaphors do much justice. Thank you for sharing.

[Melanie Genevieve]

Thank YOU for stopping by! I appreciate it immensely!
Also, I would really love it if I could get your feedback on 'My Cathedral" if you have the time.

[The Verse: A Poetry Journal]

Absolutely, Ill give it a look right away.

[Melanie Genevieve]

Thank you so much! :D

[jacob erin-cilberto]

this is beautiful...i relate in a way...my best friend died in a fire in 1984 at 27 years old...she played guitar, had a smile that was music...and i still had several of her letters in my drawer from when she moved away from carbondale....

we were so close...and she left too much to do...there was so much more.

your words are carefully chosen...and the phrasing really evokes emotion in the reader.

[wunder]

~this is such sadness - beautifully written-
and the last two verses are so emotional~
~i love the feeling of 'questions' you show
throughout...i think this is a superb write!!!~ :))

~"your words now occupy the silence in-between heartbeats
your words will live beyond your time"~ :))

[N]

This... is actually one of the greatest poems Ive read in a while. It has a very different rhythm then most, and it makes it unique and all the more stunning. I can't really think of many words to describe why I love it, but hopefully my rating will prove it. :)

[Clockwork]

You moved me to tears with this one. You open a window for your readers into you heart, but also into the vibrant life of this person, an old fashioned soul with a lot of life. You're words are honest, they brim with passion and loss. Lines such as "Your love was too late/Your death, too soon" really resonated with me. They convey your feelings with such simple language, yet such deep emotional complexity. Also, the stanza that Sage pointed out really stuck with me too.

May your friend rest in peace and hear your words echo in the place his soul resides.

[Sage Gabrielle]

"
old fashioned souls dancing on subway trains like kids
we let the car's swinging rock us to sleep and when we woke
we inhaled the night air as if it was filled with the smell of fresh-brewed coffee
invigorating, energizing, renewing, refreshing
our friendship was pure poetry"

This was such great imagery. I loved how in the third line you juxtaposed the night with freshly brewed coffee, which is typically done in the morning. It's spontaneous and out of order, but in a way it also aligns night and morning together. It's nice and classic.

24 hours with your friend was never wasted 'cause you two found a way to spend it wisely and made sure it was concentrated in the span of a night. I'd think about that.