Terrorism Rules

An Essay

So I'd like to start out by saying that I think terrorism is pretty cool.  Just the idea of blowing something up that you don't like is pretty ballsy and I secretly admire it.  As a matter of fact, I feel like the only reason that we hate terrorism so much is simple--we're on the away team!  

Imagine for a second that you were walking to your car after a delicious meal at your favorite Mexican restaurant.  The service was great, the food was fantastic, everything is going your way.  But as you approach your dingy prelude, you see a big fat Meter Maid writing you a big fat parking ticket.  You approach the creature peacefully and say, "Hey ma'am it's fine.  I'm here now to move my car.  I am no longer a threat to humanity.  You can just stop writing that." (the creature then cuts you off, insulting you with pull-string phrases like)

 SORRY, BUT ONCE I START WRITING A TICKET, I CAN"T TAKE IT BACK! or  SORRY, BUT I'M JUST DOING MY JOB! or SIR, CALM DOWN AND STOP CRYING!!

And just as you are hating her with every single bone in your body, wishing she were gone, a man emerges gloriously from within a nearby bush, runs up to her and suicide bombs her.  All that's left of the woman are the charred remains of a parking ticket, that your name has been burnt off of, forever.  I don't care what you think you'd do in that situation, but I know a part of you would be like, "Sweet! I just saved twenty six bucks!"  All Ochmed-foolery aside, I'm really beginning to question the core of terrorism and what it actually is.  I just have a hard time believing that there is this ragtag group of Austin Power's bad guys hiding in a secret lair coming up with plans to destroy western civilization, for the heck of it.  And that our only option is to destroy them.  

It's interesting how much our government hates terrorists, because I could swear that we have supported some at one point.  Like back when we funded Osama Bin Laden so he could stop the Russians from occupying Afghanistan (which, strangely enough, we now occupy) things were all good then.  We even gave them our stinger missiles to shoot things out of the sky!  But, that was before they were ugly terrorists.  Because we can't outwardly support terrorists.  No.  That sounds bad.  But, we will support the s**t out of some rebels!  Yeah rebels! That sounds so much better.  Cute little guys striving for independence, blowing stuff up that doesn't belong to us. 

The people in Libya are rebels to us, but terrorists to Gaddafi.   Put simply they are people who destroy to get their way.  And, I don't blame them.  They are fighting against a totalitarian regime that is ruining their lives.  But my question is this:  How do we know that we, The United States, are not also a totalitarian regime ruining people's lives as well?  And that our "terrorists" are just "rebels" trying to topple us and be free?   

I am by no means claiming to be an expert on government and foreign relations but I do know that history is comprised of waves of rulers who acquire territory, build an empire, and then crumble because other people are sick of them being on top.  That is a historical fact.   And it is silly to think that we are any different.  We are a world power just like Rome was a world power.  Which is weird.  Because a long time ago Rome occupied Britain, who at one point occupied us, and only thanks to our rebellious acts which were terroristic to the powers above us, were either of us able to be free to go force our views on other countries.  So maybe we shouldn't hate terrorists too much.  Because if they win, then they'll be the ones writing history.  And then we'll be the bad guys.

Author's Note

Please feel free to offer any opinion.

Reviews

[Matt McCusker]

Yeah, I hear you. However the point that I was trying to have come across is basically that all war is wrong and that we call people terrorists and its ok to kill them but then we support "rebels" who are killing other people in different that we don't care about.

[0_o Abbie]

Well to say that terrorism is cool is kind-of... (how do I say this) stupid. I'm not on either side and I strive to be politically neutral. But killing ppl is wrong. And killing ppl to inspire fear or to make a statement is wrong too. How would you explain your view to the families that lost someone in 9/11? How could you? That cop that ticketed your car, sure she might be a loser but are you ready to say she deserved to die? And if someone suicide bombed her while you were standing right next to her, you would be dead too. Do you see the flaw in your logic?

Anyways everyone has a right to their opinion. But killing is wrong and ppl go to jail for it. Why would killing in mass quantities be any different? Just a thought. :D

[Sunni Davis]

I try not to get involved in political topics because I am far from an expert, so on that topic, I'll just say you have some very interesting points. I enjoyed your writing style and found the first part about the meter maid very funny, but that could just be my odd sense of humor. You have a great way of bringing the reader into your dialogue and enjoying the essay, whether they agree with you or not. Great job!