Perspective

I'm in a land where everyone is dying

Sweet child please awake

I look up at the sky screaming, crying

God, why do you take!

What's the reason for living in this world without my baby?

I'm in a store where everyone is buying

I've got a headache

My child is loud, and is quite defying

Tom for heaven's sake!

Just get the damn toy he wants so he will shut up, just maybe?

My parents are dead, not here anymore

I sell my bare flesh

They've labeled me sinner, scarlet, a w***e

Malice thoughts, a thresh!

My face is bruised and bloody from the stones of licentious men

My parents are stupid, I slam my door

We just do not mesh

I hear the knocks, but I choose to ignore

The night air feels fresh!

I'll show them, I'm running away from home; what will they think then

Today is my birthday and I turned eight

It's time to be tough

I get my gun and go fight for my state

It's scary and rough

It hurts to breath in, It's so cold and dark; I want my mommy

Today is my birthday and I'm out late

I've not drank enough

Bartender another drink I feel great

Wow, I am hot stuff

I stumble to their table, I vomit like a tsunami

Reviews

[A. Amos]

Many layers in this piece and I have to say you truly pulled it well, congrats

[Trevor Barnett]

Thank you so much for the wonderful comment, and I'm glad you enjoyed it!

[Glen Yumang Manese]

cause and effect...
in the lines...
gets at you as a reader...
and gives the view...
at point blank range...

[Trevor Barnett]

Your wonderful reviews are much appreciated here Glen! Thanks for taking the time to review.

[Glen Yumang Manese]

you're welcome...keep up the good work...

[Redboy]

this is awesome! I like the run away.perspective best was an interesting read. keep writing.

[Trevor Barnett]

Thank you very much, and you too!

[CoraZanini]

awesome transfering from thought to thought! I like it really!

[Trevor Barnett]

Well, thank you very much NonameRa!

[Sami Khalil]

This was a wonderful write. I wholly enjoyed it...:)..................

[MsJewel]

Wow! You have written with such depth and emotion in this story/poem. Your images and emotions felt real to me.

Brilliant writing my friend.
:) Julie

[Trevor Barnett]

Thank you so much Julie! I'm really glad you liked it.

[Winter Renee Vineyard]

You change perspectives throughout your poem very smoothly.....everything works so well together. Well done!

[Trevor Barnett]

Thank you very much!!!

[Rose Diamond]

I love how you change perspectives throughout the poem, and I absolutely adore the differentiating emotions and feelings! This was spectacular! :)

[Trevor Barnett]

Thank you so much Rosie! Sometimes people just forget what's going on in this world.

[Bob Sherunkle]

Brilliant Trevor,very sad but a small insight into how some ones life turned out.Great write

[Trevor Barnett]

Thanks, much appreciated Bob!