Tram lines

Tram lines

A Poem by TLK

Lying to himself had been too easy for too long. He looked at his hands: so like his grandfather's, restless in their strength, eager to hew and saw. He wiggled his tongue: so like his father's, shy until loosened by alcohol. Without a mirror he still knew his face to be kind and forgiving like his mother's, despite his square jaw. Since achieving a pretence of independence he had thought himself a self-made man, springing whole out of his own head like an insanely incestuous Athena. Now he realised that 'to discover yourself' means that you already exist -- he had been on tram lines the whole time. He had followed his passions, forgetting that his passions were in his heart to begin with. "I was a piece of marble," he said to himself, whisky helping him talk. "And in it I found the soul of the material, the shape that was always meant to be expressed." Perhaps this is self-made enough, he thought. And then he felt shame, for other hands had worked on that marble, and he had belittled them for touching him.

© 2013 TLK



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Featured Review

We are what we are, flaws and all and, it's the flaws that make us human, whether self.inflicted or adorned by the world in which we live. Surely? Whether we live alone or with others, thought will fly us into another place and whatever wholeness or purity we lean towards will slowly, slowly bend. It's life, not guilt.

Your writing pushes the reader.reviewer onto another level, that's always so very welcome.

Posted 4 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

TLK

4 Years Ago

Thank you for being willing to be 'pushed' -- it's this kind of acceptance that makes me want to kee.. read more



Reviews

We are what we are, flaws and all and, it's the flaws that make us human, whether self.inflicted or adorned by the world in which we live. Surely? Whether we live alone or with others, thought will fly us into another place and whatever wholeness or purity we lean towards will slowly, slowly bend. It's life, not guilt.

Your writing pushes the reader.reviewer onto another level, that's always so very welcome.

Posted 4 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

TLK

4 Years Ago

Thank you for being willing to be 'pushed' -- it's this kind of acceptance that makes me want to kee.. read more
Write more and soon your poetic skills will be polished, because the idea going through your poem is amazing! It has a whole story which is so enjoyable for the readers.

Posted 4 Years Ago


Wow that was really good and very different. Most people have never really thought of how all of the people that have influenced them have really shaped their lives and this definitely brings that to light. Wonderful job!

Posted 4 Years Ago


I adore those first three lines. I often think of the mix of pieces that come together in a person, that seem to run down in the family

Posted 4 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I really enjoyed the inner dialogue of this piece, as a man it's hard to admit help even from yourself, and to admit others played a part in building the person you are is very difficult. It is like your most precious creation, your own ego.
Hope that was good enough for you, I must say I was a bit intimidated by your about thingy, where you mentioned naff reviews. Perhaps you can help me become a more accomplished reviewer. I have been writing for four months now. I'll review more of your stuff as I enjoy it.

Posted 4 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Beautiful introspection piece. The self-made man is a myth typically inflicted upon us by points of view too narrow to see beyond the Tram lines of their own lives. They see only only the shining set of tracks; the rest of us see connecting lines, swtiches, signals, and workers on those tracks. Sometimes it takes us a while to come around, but we get there eventually. There is a quote atributed to Pete Seeger, something I will have to paraphrase [badly] because I only heard it spoken aloud once.

"Love without wisdom and compassion is vapid and blind, like blind ptriotism. Wisdom without love and compassion is self-serving, like scientific eugenics. Compassion without wisdom and love is saccharine and weak and does not allow for forward progress." His point was that all three things had to be present in some amount in a man's life, in his community, his society, etc. They are the checks and balances for a life well-lived.

Posted 4 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

TLK

4 Years Ago

Excellent quote: I'm looking for it now.
TLK

4 Years Ago

I found something a little similar here: http://www.peteseeger.net/Incompleat%20Love%20Songs.htm
Marie Anzalone

4 Years Ago

YES!
and can I say I also loved, "Thou shalt not commit nincompoopery?"
(self) confession is best for the soul

Posted 4 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.


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1956 Views
29 Reviews
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Shelved in 4 Libraries
Added on May 31, 2013
Last Updated on May 31, 2013
Tags: haw, saw, wiggling, loosen, forgive

Author

TLK
TLK

Birmingham, West Midlands, United Kingdom



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Signed up to the Pledge to Civil Conduct in Discourse on Writer's Cafe: please challenge me if you think I am breaking either the letter or the spirit of the rules. I try to review well myself (see.. more..

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