I'm just standing there

I'm just standing there

Right in the middle

Between happy and sad

Between hope and despair

But as time passes

The tip is turned

It edges towards the dark side

Just because it's an easier path to go through

I'm just standing there

Right at the edge

Looking down at the darkness beneath me

All past memories ache in my subconscious

Make me feel regret

What's the point I think

As I look down into the bottomless pit

I'm just standing there

Inside the darkness

It envelopes me

Seeps into me

Into my heart and mind

Making me numb

And forget my memoires

Why am I this way?

Why be cursed by such a gift?

So I'm just standing there, wondering

Author's Note

First time writing a poem,just wanted to let it out.

Reviews

[Patient Poet (Yos)]

This is so beautiful ! .... I can't believe its your first time, its strong, full with emotions , like life, you should write more Poetry :) Yossi

[IAmFiyah]

That's a good poem for your first try. I just started reading your book and I like it so far.

[Dennis Shanaberg]

"The tip is turned / It edges towards the dark side / Just because it's an easier path to go through"
Love those three lines.
I think this is a brilliant bit of work. There is just so much emotion in each individual line. I cannot really believe that this is your first poem.
My first one ended up being like then pages of a story that made no sense and rhymes that were just out there. Regardless, great job esp. for a first try.
Keep it up.

[BloodyRaven]

Hey, I like this, probably more than your other one, actually. I like the way you convey the emotions, and that this person seems to have a 'curse', and that they're being engulfed by this seemingly omnipresent force, like they can't escape. Great job, gosh darnit, I love what you write!

[ChristianM]

Wow Tali this was excellent.
First time. I find that a little hard to believe. ;) lol
But you put many poets to shame with this gem.

[alan khan]

interesting spin on a common emotion. very visual. i enjoyed it, nice stuff.

[Ishan Sadwelkar]

Whoa.
Tali this can't be your first time
Liar!

Very frank, straightforward
I like the use of punctuations
And the independent treatment of each line

Good
Now don't stop writing poetry
Have fun

Ishan

[Dream Catcher]

This was very, very good. I can EASILY relate to this, the back and forth, stuck in the middle feeling. I hate it, and as much as I hate that feeling, I must say you captured it perfectly. Very good flow and I like the transitions you incorporated into this poem. Very good for your first one. Keep it up, cheers! [:

[Peter Schal]

Dang. Talk about poetic talent, especially for a first-timer. Great work, Tali. Powerful and heartfelt. :)

[Livenrite]

WoW! An awesome poem! It's hard to believe this is your first one...as you write more, you'll get the hang of it... And you should write more! I can feel the emotion and the confusion. A great write. Thanks for sharing:)