No Place to Hide

An unfinished short story about a 14 year-old girl who is left home alone while her parents go out for the night

Christina danced around the living room, her favorite band blaring from the speakers.  Oh, how she loved being home alone.  "One day, I'll be in a band," She promised her chocolate lab, Austin.  Though she had posted many videos of her singing, she remained undiscovered.

The song came to end and Chris took out the CD.  She snatched the remote and plopped down on her couch.  Austin climbed up next to her as she flipped through the channels.  Adventure Time seemed to be the only decent thing on at the moment, so she pressed the select button and set off for the kitchen.

"Yummy, Mountain Dew."  Christina cracked open the icy, green can and took a sip.  The crisp, tangy flavor flooded her mouth.  She glanced out the window to find the sun disappearing behind the tree line.  "Ugh," she sighed grumpily.  "They'll be home soon."  Austin stretched out across her lap as she reclaimed her spot on the couch.  "Austin!  You are not a lap dog!  You weigh like a hundred pounds!"  Austin grumbled but refused to move.  "You're crushing me!"  Finally, she understood how Mom must have always felt.  "Except she deserves it. . . ."  She spoke aloud, a wave of loneliness washing over her.

One day after school, Christina had been (kind of) doing her homework.  Her mother had been at work and just arrived home.  Christina's mother called her into the kitchen and handed her a tiny, brown puppy.  She gaped, wide-eyed, at her mom as the puppy squirmed and wriggled in her arms.  "The pound was going to put him to sleep."  Mom stated matter-of-factly.  She was about to ask why when she noticed the gauze covering the small creature's fat belly.  Then, Mom brought him to Dad.  It took a long time, but they finally convinced him to keep the dog.  Since then, Austin replaced Chris.  Austin was Mom's favorite.  Austin was Mom's baby.  Christina was invisible.

The phone rang, snapping her out of her flashback.  "Hello?" She answered politely.

"Hey, Chris!  What's up?"  She smiled at Sarah's voice.

"Oh, nothin' much, got the house all to myself. . . Except for Austin."

"Awesome, you should totally invite boys over."

Neither of the best friends had a boyfriend, but Sarah was the prettiest girl in their grade.  Sarah was also fifteen, a year older than Christina, and she had already kissed a boy.

"No, boys don't like me.  And you know how mad Mom and Dad would get.  It's like they're Satan when they get mad."  She giggled with Sarah.

"I know right!  And what do you mean, boys don't like you?  Kaleb was sooooo checking you out yesterday.  Chrissy, even you have to admit that boy is smokiinnn'.  Oh my God!  I'm gonna Facebook him your address and tell him to come see you!  Gotta go, bye!"

"Wait, no!"  Christina began, but the call was already disconnected.  "Crap. . . ."  Sarah always did stupid stuff like that.  Letting out an angry "grr," she stomped off.  She couldn't try calling Sarah back and talking her out of it, either.  Once Sarah had made up her mind, there was no changing it.

Austin trotted up to her and gave her the puppy face.  "Oh Boo-Boo,"  Chris gushed as she scratched him behind the ears.  "You hungry?"  She poured some food into his food bowl, which he devoured in half a minute.  "I guess so."  Then, Austin started lapping up water as if he was about to die of thirst.  "Hey, hey, save some for the fish, Buddy."  He resumed drinking.  "Wanna go outside!?"  Chris yelled with fake excitement.  Austin looked at her hopefully and perked his ears up.  They ran to the door.

The moon glowed softly, casting a silver light over the yard.  Austin tugged on his leash, yanking her forward.  "Austin, no," Chris scolded.  Austin growled viciously, baring his teeth.  "You're scaring me, boy."  Chris felt cold terror creep up her spine as she frantically pulled Austin back to the front door.  They had almost made it to the porch when Austin barked like a lunatic and shot forward.  Still holding onto the leash, Christina jolted forward, falling and scraping her hands and knees.

The world fell silent.  Chris got up and screamed her dog's name.  He didn't come.  What was that?  Chris thought, every sense alert, waiting for danger, prepared to bolt into the house.  Austin began whimpering and yelping. 

"Get away from him!!!!" Chris screamed hysterically, running toward the noise with tears streaming down her face.  A sudden silence engulfed the night, reminding her of the feeling she got when a heavy blanket covered her mouth.  It seemed difficult to breathe.  There wasn't enough oxygen to fill her lungs.  The wind carried a quiet whimpering.  Chris took a few steps forward.  Austin barely lifted his head from a puddle of blood that pooled by her feet.

"Austin. . . ."  She breathed.  Her dog was going to die.  There was no question about it.  Malicious slashes ran up and down his side.  Each of them dripped the thick, red liquid.  Chris could even smell it as she stared, completely lost in shock.  The dog's whining drifted to her ears.

Chris turned and crouched and was sick, sobbing and coughing.

Austin's chest still moved.  He shook.  He whined.  His pain continued.

A voice commanded "Run."

Chris ran.

Author's Note

It's not finished yet. Reviews?

Reviews

[Roxas Ohara]

Very powerful. The end of the passage causes a mixture of fear and anxiety in the fear of the unknown. The background information funnels into the relationship between the two girls, and provides a clear and concise problem between the two. Excellent story, very excellent (: I love it. Keep writing!

[JGIII]

Good compelling read that makes me want to read the rest of the story. I like how you ended. I was a little confused because you started to create a rivalry between Chris and Austin then you described Austin as Chris' dog near the end of the chapter.
It seems you originally wrote this in first person, I say that because you called Christina's mother Mom in the third and fourth paragraphs whereas a strict third person narration would have said her mother.
It is distracting that you alternate between calling your protagonist Chris and Christina. I think it would be better to pick one, possibly using the full name at first then switching to the nickname for the rest of the chapter.
All in all, it's a great premise, an intriguing story with only minor issues to correct. Keep it up.