Her World Of Fantasies
A Book by Blue Ivory
© 2013 Blue Ivory
Featured Review
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Just finished chapter 10. Interesting story. I'm curious as to what happened to Melissa's father. But I like the way the story is developing with her becoming more open. Maybe new faces in the house will raise her mother's spirits and she will begin to get better. I thoroughly enjoyed it though and at no point due to lack of grammar skill or interest did I decide to stop reading. I look forward to seeing what else you have.
Cheers
Posted 11 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
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11 Years Ago
Thank you so much for the lovely review :D I love receiving feedback from my readers. Updating won't.. read moreThank you so much for the lovely review :D I love receiving feedback from my readers. Updating won't take long as I keep the chapters short :)
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Reviews
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Finished! This was amazing, I loved your description in each chapter, you had me intrigued with every chapter, I wanted to read more and more!
Great job, you've really done an amazing job! :)
~ Noodle.
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
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10 Years Ago
Thanks so much! :D I'll write more soon and then let you know okay? :3
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10 Years Ago
Sounds good to me! C:
Pleasure.
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Just finished chapter 10. Interesting story. I'm curious as to what happened to Melissa's father. But I like the way the story is developing with her becoming more open. Maybe new faces in the house will raise her mother's spirits and she will begin to get better. I thoroughly enjoyed it though and at no point due to lack of grammar skill or interest did I decide to stop reading. I look forward to seeing what else you have.
Cheers
Posted 11 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
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11 Years Ago
Thank you so much for the lovely review :D I love receiving feedback from my readers. Updating won't.. read moreThank you so much for the lovely review :D I love receiving feedback from my readers. Updating won't take long as I keep the chapters short :)
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So beautiful and dream like and surreal yet very powerful and clear at the same time.
Posted 11 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
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Marvelous description, Siren. The aura of poverty came through clearly and with that touch of despair it should have for the reader. This is a fine work and I want to see where it goes.
Posted 11 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
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11 Years Ago
Thanks so much!
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Great uplifting story, to be able to enjoy yourself in any kind of situation is important and the fact is many of poorer people might be the happier. Very good write this, i like it!!Well done!!
Posted 11 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
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11 Years Ago
Thank you! :$
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It always takes my breath away when a short story can have such a powerful punch in meaning.. This is wonderful and full thoughtful inspiration..xo
Posted 11 Years Ago
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11 Years Ago
Thanks, I'm glad you think so!
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Nice short piece and you give a rich insight into 'the life of', which makes me think this could be longer, could be a book, I enjoyed this very much, good work
Posted 11 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
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11 Years Ago
Yeah I felt that way too, so I tried making like a part 2 or something, but I couldn't maintain the .. read moreYeah I felt that way too, so I tried making like a part 2 or something, but I couldn't maintain the standard, so I decided to leave it as it is.
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11 Years Ago
Yes I get the same problem, I find I need to spread out my better lines and thoughts otherwise the w.. read moreYes I get the same problem, I find I need to spread out my better lines and thoughts otherwise the whole thing just grinds to a halt
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11 Years Ago
Lol, but keep going please, its good
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11 Years Ago
I'll try! :) Nice to get encouragement. I normally don't write short stories. So wasn't that confide.. read moreI'll try! :) Nice to get encouragement. I normally don't write short stories. So wasn't that confident :P Thank you!
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An intriguing slice of life; nicely styled and well expressed.
You wail, Siren!
Posted 11 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
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In some form we all create our own reality, but eventually it smashes into the walls erected by those around us.
I enjoyed the story, there are a few grammatical problems, and sentences that are a little awkward, but overall a great job. :)
Posted 11 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
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11 Years Ago
I can always count on you to be honest :) Could you please point out the grammatical errors so I can.. read moreI can always count on you to be honest :) Could you please point out the grammatical errors so I can improve? I genuinely want to learn cuz I'm hoping to maybe someday build a career in writing.
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11 Years Ago
awkward sentence: "The electricity bill hadn't been paid then, she understood." I'm just not sure.. read moreawkward sentence: "The electricity bill hadn't been paid then, she understood." I'm just not sure what you meant to say there.
There's a great little book that helped me. It's called 'The Elements of Style" by Strunk and White. It's a very small book but very concise.
On a second read that's all I saw, but I haven't had coffee yet. :P
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11 Years Ago
Thank you so much :) And what I meant was, she flipped the switch for the light, but it didn't turn .. read moreThank you so much :) And what I meant was, she flipped the switch for the light, but it didn't turn on. Meaning the electricity bill hadn't been paid. Cuz they're so poor and she's been distracted.
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11 Years Ago
I'd write 'The electricity bill hadn't been paid." and leave it at that, the additional words just m.. read moreI'd write 'The electricity bill hadn't been paid." and leave it at that, the additional words just make the sentence awkward.
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11 Years Ago
I kinda felt that way too. I appreciate your opinion. Thank you!
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Sometime we learn to accept less and enjoy the small things. I like the thoughts and the description of the location. A powerful tale. I like the ending a lot. Thank you for the excellent story.
Coyote
Posted 11 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
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11 Years Ago
Glad you liked it!
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Stats
648 Views
11 Reviews
Added on October 26, 2012
Last Updated on February 28, 2013
Author
Blue IvoryDhaka, Bangladesh
About
I am a sugarcoated wreck. A cupcake with a chipped human tooth baked inside it. I breathe out soot left behind by the corpses you tried to bury but I come to you served in a silver platter.
A hot.. more..
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