The Year Santa Went Insane

Dark humor.

 

The year Santa went insane

Christmas was never really the same

Was his suit red with his own blood?

Did he still have his tormented wife’s love?

 

What about all those little green elves?

All their toys Santa placed back on the shelves

The reindeer were put out to greener pastures

Now spiders hang from the castle’s rafters

 

Santa stopped eating pies and jellies

Quickly down shrank his big fat belly

He locked his door, no more singing for him

Would the world ever see Christmas again?

 

The ivory snowflakes continued to fall

For toys the children continued to call

Decorations fell from the Christmas trees

Nothing left of Christmas was there to see

 

I heard Santa laugh and scream

I was certain it was only a bad dream

But when I saw the wildness in his eyes

I knew for his madness there was no disguise

 

Santa went raving about the room

The elves and reindeer fled in doom

This year Santa canceled the Christmas season

He went insane, that is the reason

 

I told Santa, “Do not seek therapy.

The professionals will blame you, you’ll see.

Stay safe being crazy at the North Pole.

Send someone else out at Christmas. No one will know.”

 

 

 

 

 

Reviews

[Zoe Jay]

What a great little quirky, dark, creepy, funny poem! The rhythm and rhyme scheme give it a bounce and cheerfulness that is almost nursery-rhyme like, and that really contrasts with, and amps up, the sinister theme. But for me, the importance of this poem is as a metaphor for the insanity of Christmas, how we have killed Christmas with commercialism, until something must give somewhere. Like all good humorous poetry, it contains a serious message which is very well and clearly expressed. I think a lot of us associate Christmas with insanity in any case, so it's also relevant for us on a personal level. Finally, I like how the poem reminds us that everyone needs love and support at Christmas, and sometimes the people who need love and support the most are the people who we never think about, because we are looking to them to love and support us. I like the way you have cleverly woven these different messages and layers of perception into a quirky, digestible, format.... really well done!!

[Black Cat Fever]

Poor Santa. Too much pressure perhaps. I agree, stay away from the professional, they'll just drug you into mindlessness.

[Star Wolf]

Great job on the dark humor, I'd tell Santa the same thing you did, better not to seek help with 'professionals' but send someone else out in his place until he's feeling better. I love this, awesome write!

[Texas]

Don't we all have those days...years. Nice work. I love dark humor. :)

[Sean M. Addams]

very cute piece ..love the humor in this alot ... nice job on this ...a very cool twist on santa