Do You Deserve Happiness

“Do you deserve happiness?”

The demon giggled at my torment. Laughed at my misery. It fed of it, growing by each tear it made me shed. It could turn into an unmeasurable void, sucking every positive cell in my body into its oblivion. Why did I let it reign? Why could its voice not be silent?

“Are you really worth anything?”

My insides twisted and churned, making my stomach feel like a remorseless battlefield. It repeated it, over and over again.

“Are you really worth anything?”

“Are you really worth anything?”

“Are you really worth anything?”

“Are you really worth anything?”

“Are you really worth anything?”

“Are you really worth anything?”

“Are you really worth anything?”

Eventually, I believed it. No matter what lies others convinced me of, I knew the demon to speak the truth. Why else would it keep repeating it? Why else would this lump festered inside me, forcing me to heave for my breath.

Why do I Exist?

I’m not denying the emotion of happiness in my life, but it is but a short, flawed vacation from this everlasting suffering. It is but a fleeting drug, bringing me to a fantastic ecstasy of joy and tranquility, only to plunge me deeper into despair once the effects retract. And at the bottom of the pit I have fallen into, is the demon, smiling at me. Greeting me like an old friend.

“You don’t deserve happiness, do you?”

I’ve tried keeping it away from me, but no matter the fight I put up, the demon always wins. Always. Am I really destined to harbor this monster eternally? I…I fear I can’t take it anymore. I’m so sick of fighting, of swimming against the tide…

 

 

Please

Please, help me

I’m begging you  

Please…...

 

 

GetoutofmyheadgetoutofmyheadgetoutofmyheadgetoutofmyheadgetoutofmyheadgetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyheadGetoutofmyhead

Haha. Hahaha.

HahaHahaHahaHahaHahaHahaHahaHaha.

The solution has been here the entire time.

 

I’ll end this.

I’ll end it all.

 

And in the end

 

I will stand victorious.

 

And you will lose

 

Hahahahaha.

 

Goodbye demon.

 

 

I’ll see you in Hell

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

                                                        I win

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I win