The Untitled horror

A poem that talks about a man's hypochondriac battles inside his own twisted mind..

Grate my skin
Scratch out my hair
Drip me in sin
Oh! Satan show me not mercy here

Carve my suffering
Like the craftsman of old
Rush forth your evil like a coiled thing
And pour your sadist blessings better untold

Make me cry
Make me beg for a minute shred of pity
From even the most miscreant fly
But Lucifer let not your whip slow in its fury

Hurt me till I'm numb
A mindless zombie
Punished yet thriving under your thumb
Oh sin! Sweet sin imbibe me

Break me free from my bonds
Rend to pieces my captor's holy rainments
Throw him into hell's fiery ponds
As I sniveling beneath your sulfurous garments

Oh! What freedom I crave
I know you'll give
For either on land or in my grave
On Your lies and reviled pride shall I live

Author's Note

I really want to know if my message was passed across

Reviews

[J. Justice Mendez]

The only message I really received from this poem was despair, I don't know if that's what you were trying to convey.
It sounds like the writer is going through some serious s**t. At first I thought it was about torturous suicide, like the guy really hates himself for some reason and he wants to go out in the worst way possible. But then the last couple of lines made me think he's just going through a lot of mental anguish.
Bottom line, in my opinion, not really scary at all. More or less just makes me want to refer the writer to a psychiatrist.

[Treason and Metal]

It wasn't meant to be horrific.. oh.. The contest.. that was just a kind of joke.. I couldn't know horror if I had it in front of me.. Thanks for the tell though..PS we are crazy in sort form 😉😉😉

[J. Justice Mendez]

Of course. All artists are crazy, some of us just know how to hide it. ;D

[Treason and Metal]

Yeah.. Guess you're one of the lucky ones or ure just seasoned at hiding the crazy till u want it out eh??
😁 😀

[Shabeeh Haider]

Quite a dark write. A hint of masochism. Sometimes life leaves us with no other option but to rebel.
The last stanza sums up your poem very well.

[Treason and Metal]

Yeah thanks.. it was nice seeing the message passed across.. thank u

[Treason and Metal]

I'd like to get reviews and comments.. Is it something I did or am i not seeing them