Melody

Melody

A Story by Aislinn Gryffin ((Ashes))

12-13-08

Dear Diary,

I saw her today. Melody. She looked the way she did when i last saw her. Long raven curls framing the pale, pale face that surrounded those unusual eyes. Purple eyes. I'd never seen purple eyes before, and i've never seen them since. I'm glad. Those naturally purple eyes were a sign. A sign she was special...

I saw her today. She was wearing that black dress Mom had bought her. She was holding her violin. I remembered a long-forgotten memory:

"It's not just a violin, Rory,"  Melody told me, voice serious but eyes smiling. "It's part of me. Going somewhere without it would be like you going somewhere without your arm."

I tilted my head to the side and watched her tuck it lovingly into its case.

 

I saw her today. She was wearing the black pearl bracelet and the cameo ring that she inherited from our great-grandma. She was barefoot. Mom wouldn't have let her go barefoot to the recital, but as soon as Mom had dropped us off, Melody had slipped off the "horrid heels" that she'd been wearing. Melody was always barefoot. She used to take me to her "secret place" and play her violin and twirl and dance and spin barefoot on the carpet of leaves and stomped pine needles. I would sit and watch her dance around the pine trees and I'd listen to the voice of her violin. She was graceful. A woodland fairy come to life. She was only lacking the wings.

 

I saw her today. The Replacements drove me away from the old foster home. We passed the charred remains of my house. They started to drive by slow and then stopped, awarding me a final glimpse of my home. Melody was playing her violin. She was twirling and dancing gracefully on the porch. She stopped when she saw me. She stood there facing me, standing on the balls of her feet. She held her violin by her side. And then she gave me a sad smile, waved, and blew a kiss. She stepped off the porch and began to play again, half-dancing half-walking towards her secret place. I watched her go, thinking that i had been lucky.

I had gotten a beautiful big sister. A special girl. I never was jealous of her. She was far too modest and humble to ever be jealous of. I don't think she ever realized she was beautiful. She really didn't. And today, watching her walk to her secret place, I knew that I had had the best gift of all. The fire had taken everything away from me, even the gift. But I'd had her, even if it wasn't for as long as i'd liked. The rest of the world will have to go on with Melody, but she'll always be my beautiful, woodland fairy-like sister. She'll still be in my heart. I'll still fall asleep to the sound of her violin. Even if the Replacements are my parents now, not my real Mom and Dad, I'll still have Melody's music and all her notebooks and diaries.

 

I saw her today. For the last time. The car is parking in the driveway of my new home now. I keep thinking about that rehearsal. If I hadn't been at Cassie's after the rehearsal, I would be with Melody and Mom and Dad, wherever they are. But I'm not. I went to Cassie's to sleepover the night of the fire. And I wasn't there when it destroyed everything. I wish Melody had been there with me. She always was a deep sleeper. I wish she hadn't been. But wishes don't get you anywhere. So I guess I have to get out of the car and start over again. New life, new parents, new family, new diary...new sister.

 

Goodbye, my friend. Time to start a new story. A new diary.

Goodbye, diary. Goodbye, Melody.

I love you,

Aurora ((Rory))

© 2009 Aislinn Gryffin ((Ashes))


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Featured Review

Hmm. . . This is certainly hard to review. It was beautiful, answering all of my questions the moment they pop into my head. All questions but one.
I am assuming Melody dies in the fire by the way she says Goodbye to her . . . and I know that you are trying to make it interesting by being vague, but maybe you give another clue? I think I got it, but . . . Maybe one more detail to put her name on the grave, you know? (Wow, that sounded cruel). Anyway, great job, I really liked it.


Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Congrats on your winning story

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

this was really good. it was simple, but quite moving. i was completely sucked in. its very touching and sad, yet hopeful and uplifting at the same time.
V. has a good point about the first person, but let it be known that at times it works, and it works great here. the story definitely wouldn't be the same without it. the feeling wouldn't get across very well otherwise. yes, its hard to make a full length book in first person, but i really don't think that's what you are going for with this, and as a stand alone piece, it is very moving.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Hmm. . . This is certainly hard to review. It was beautiful, answering all of my questions the moment they pop into my head. All questions but one.
I am assuming Melody dies in the fire by the way she says Goodbye to her . . . and I know that you are trying to make it interesting by being vague, but maybe you give another clue? I think I got it, but . . . Maybe one more detail to put her name on the grave, you know? (Wow, that sounded cruel). Anyway, great job, I really liked it.


Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

interesting, this would be cool to see you flesh out. But its a good start. Careful with the first person dairy stuff.
It locks you into a perspective, its much easier and better to tell a story from the narrator view.
Very few authors have been able to pull off a book or story from first person.
(yet all authors seem to start this way) but the faster you give it up the faster you will be able to complete stories.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 2 people found this review constructive.

This really was beautiful and moving - Melody was indeed a treat to meet.

The way you have written this short story, makes it feel like poetry. It flows very smoothly through the mind and leaves a pleasant aftertaste.

I shall definitely read more of your work.

Lady

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

What a sad tale. You revealed a lot about the characters' lives in a short amount of time.
Thanks for entering my contest!
~Lauren

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Added on July 13, 2009


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