Inevitably

A Poem by Abraham Luna

Somethings are just bound to happen.

Abraham Luna

Inevitably

What seemed like an eternity was all an illusion. A figment of my imagination for nothing lasts forever. It’s always a matter of time and when. So, tell me how long do I want to waste my time with you only to be disappointed in the end. This is what you call post break up syndrome. At first you reacted to my actions as “not surprising.” So, what I did was only a matter of time of when I would f*** up? I am a good guy I told myself. Resorting to alcohol I did not. For if I did I would just be like the father figure that I despise. I WAS the good guy. Now I’m a liar to you. Once I realized the results of my actions I lost myself. I tricked myself into believing that I missed you and that I loved you, for I did not love you anymore. Just as you didn’t love me anymore. We grew apart. I just wanted to fill the void in my heart that wasn’t getting the same affection that it was putting out. Maybe that’s why you did what you did when we were “working things out” to get back at me… possibly? but that matters not anymore for I am a changed man now. I do not. I will not let my past actions define who I am as a person. I am now distant to protect myself. I guess you could say afraid to get hurt again. I show that I don’t care as much to guard myself. I could only blame both of us for this happening. I take out the trash. Now for some reason I begin to have a memory of you and it’s like PTSD. I want to forget but I can’t. For the triggers is what brings you back and I desperately want to forget about you. I no longer love you. I just want to forget about you. This is what was inevitable.