Torn Wings

 

An angel sits upon a stool,

and sings her saddest song.

There are no words, just mournful sounds,

she's been in pain so long.

 

Her wings are in tatters,

her robes are torn.

She cries herself to sleep,

her energy worn.

 

Her throat so very sore,

from all her screaming.

She's moaning painfully,

her tears still streaming.

 

She can remember,

the happiness she had.

She had a good life,

but it's now so sad.

 

She wishes there was something left to lose,

something to protect.

She used to be the cause of things,

but now she's just the effect.

 

And now she cowers,

full of fear.

That strong, mystifying angel,

is forever stranded here.

Reviews

[dreamer :)]

That's really good!! It has very thick emotion! I loved reading it. I only read it like you know, four or five times!! :P hahaha great job!

[Numb]

I loved the imagery you set, once again. A beautiful, beautiful poem. The first stanza really set up the stage, you could say, and everything just flowed amazingly from that point on. I loved the last stanza, it grabbed at me and was a wonderful way to end.

~N~

[Tim]

A fallin angel in tears with no hope. Is it possible even angels get too old? Just a thought you gave me. Nice job.

[Elvina CZq]

This is so beautiful, yet so very sad. Such simple words yet such strong emotion. You are brilliant on this piece.

[alesuriko]

I really enjoyed the first stanza. After the wording sort of fell flat. The rhythm just wasn't as powerful as it was in the first stanza and the flow was off a bit. But the emotion was held throughout the entire poem. The imagery was also very well expressed. With the line "but now she's just the effect." That's one particular line that threw off the flow for me. What's being expressed by it, with "used to be the cause of things" and now she is the end result, is really good. I liked that. The line just seemed too long, especially with the word "just." Otherwise, very nice poem. Loved the imagery.

[Bette]

so sad. well done

[Zana]

dang.......these ones......im speechless :}

[Chloe..Across the Unive..]

I agree with all the reviews below, a wonderful write with much emotion and a beautiful presentation.


Chloe

[luvy]

i don't even know what to say this is brilliant

[HorrorMaster]

A great poem, excellent work