I have a secret

I have a secret

A Poem by VintageHottie
"

This is about someone who used me and I had a secret that I'm sure he didn't want anyone to know.....Oops, oh well ;)

"

Why do I satisfy my desires,

With cheaters and liars?

Thinking I need them to want me,

Yet memories of them haunt me,

Giving me no satisfaction at all.

 

Why do I fight it tooth and nail,

When each fight I fail?

Throwing me deeper in the dirt,

surrounded by my anger, blood and hurt,

Further down in the pits I fall.

 

My body is through being used,

It's scarred and abused,

My heart no longer can stand it,

When soemone kicks, hits and brands it,

And throws it around like a rag doll.

 

I'm no longer available to employ,

I won't offer my pain for your joy,

You are no longer welcome, you have outlived your stay,

So do yourself a favor and walk quickly away,

And I won't tell everyone that you're small.

 

© 2009 VintageHottie


Author's Note

VintageHottie
Just something I was toying with. The ending makes me laugh ;)

My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register




Reviews

Please don`t tell !

This would be a cute poem if it were
not for the trail of melancholy
throughout.
There is a lesson for the abusers here.

She`ll tell !

Rated--- 100 %

-----Eagle Cruagh

Posted 14 Years Ago


I really love this...but not all men are jerks, atleast I don't think so. Keep your hopes up, who knows what'll happen for you :). It's an overall good write I really love the flow you've given to it. It has a nice beat and you can read the passion in it. Really great job in my opinion I love the ending! It makes the poem go out with a big BOOM! and that's one of my favorite traits a poem can have.
My favorite part was
"My body is through being used,

It's scarred and abused,

My heart no longer can stand it,

When soemone kicks, hits and brands it,

And throws it around like a rag doll."



Great Job. Amazing write and rememeber KEEP WRITING!!!

Posted 14 Years Ago


I think this is a poem everyone can relate to.
"You are no longer welcome, you have outlived your stay,
So do yourself a favor and walk quickly away,
And I won't tell everyone that you're small."
Haha that last bit made me laugh :]
This is a really amazing, emotional poem.
Good job!

Thanks for your review.



Posted 14 Years Ago


I like it very much.
i know the feeling, to have people walk an step on you as if you are nothing, when you yourself simply want to be happy.
brilliant.

Posted 14 Years Ago


its good that you can write with passion, and heal yourself with a witty, funny ending. its refreshing :D

and just remember:
men are d*********s

Posted 14 Years Ago


hahah perfect ending i have to say...

i love the pacing of this, very rhythmic, and it is nearly as if we are watching you think out your decision to end the realtionship..

Posted 14 Years Ago


ROTFL! Love the last line. That is fine revenge. I like this piece. I always appreciate rhyme. Personally, I suck at it so it is always nice to see someone do it well and you did here. I had no trouble following your thought process. Well done!

Posted 14 Years Ago


I know everyone so far seems to be amused by the funny ending, but I think this poem is full of emotions and pain, and it's quite brave of you to write this piece and be so honest. Well done.

Posted 14 Years Ago


I actually laughed when I read the ending. A very heart felt poem, I think. Well done!

Posted 14 Years Ago


[send message][befriend] Subscribe
JC
Loved the ending...

Women have the innate ability to choose the wrong man and for the wrong reasons. I know I've been in that club. LOL

Very clever work!



JC

Posted 14 Years Ago



First Page first
Previous Page prev
1
Share This
Email
Facebook
Twitter
Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe

Compartment 114
Compartment 114
Advertise Here
Want to advertise here? Get started for as little as $5

Stats

587 Views
13 Reviews
Rating
Added on July 12, 2009
Last Updated on July 12, 2009

Author

VintageHottie
VintageHottie

CA



About
Im 25 and have been writing poetry since I could rhyme. I've had one poem published when I was 8 and that was pretty much it. I wrote my sorrow on paper and when I tried to turn my life around I.. more..

Writing

Related Writing

People who liked this story also liked..


laptop lover laptop lover

A Story by Ambrosia


Cliche Cliche

A Poem by Ligeia