Pillow of Shoes

Accepting consciousness in a gasoline whale

Carelessly sliding in a hospital mirror 

Reflecting silky moths sailing through space 

In juxtaposition with a pillow of shoes

Ethereally sinking in the electric chairs

In a room full of mellow eyes

Surrounded by a calm sea

A floating Iris in the sunshine

Dancing in the wind 

Through the grassy hills

Melting the toxic barricades 

Wandering innocence with mischievous desires

Of corrupt ideas pillaging her mind with bombardments of soft pianos

Gently gliding down into her subconscious 

The foggy hills in the dull blue rain

Slowly dripping down from the smoky clouds which wind over-head

Docile dreams dip sequentially throughout the atmosphere

Freedom approaches 

Reviews

[Lorna]

Extremely powerful imagery. Really beautiful use of language, wonderful choice of words.

[eglantine]

This is much better than the first version I read. Nice job on adjusting line breaks. There is a lot of verb -ing going on, which can be a mouthful, perhaps try slimming down?