My fight

I... I don't know

Do you know the feeling,

Of drowning whilst sitting in air,

The feeling of a world gone wrong,

When your life has been so simple,

 

Sitting, staring, breathing,

But not really breathing,

Just sitting, staring into empty,

Because mind is yet again, hurting,

 

Suffocating me with little things,

Laughing when the tears start to fall,

Sitting on my chest when I want to breathe,

And killing me slowly, when I want to live,

 

I can see my ribs now,

Not so prominent,

Not so hidden,

But the mirror tells me otherwise,

 

I feel plagued, every day,

It sits there in the back of mind,

Waiting for the worst moment to reveal,

To take away everything I am,

 

First my confidence,

And then the safety of my mind,

The food in my stomach, and then,

Maybe one day my life,

 

A disease I cannot fight,

Conforming to each of my strategies,

Learning the behavior of my time,

And striking each battle into dust,

 

I’m beginning to lose hope,

The cracks are so visible,

And my tears just won’t stop,

I think I’m scared,

 

Scared that I am losing this fight,

Scared that everything I want to do,

Everything I have ever dreamed of,

Is becoming irrelevant to my pain,

 

Pressure building in my chest,

Fear taking over control,

Temptation growing by the second,

I can’t take this any more,

 

I don’t know who I am anymore,

I don’t know what my purpose is,

I don’t know if this fight is worth it,

And I just don’t know anything anymore,

 

I am a person with flaws,

I am a person that is struggling,

But refuses to say a word,

Because this is my fight to lose.

Reviews

[Hebe]

This is stunning in every way. Your description and depth really takes you to that scary place.
I can see my ribs now,
Not so prominent,
Not so hidden,
But the mirror tells me otherwise,

I got such a visual from this! Incredible work!

[WillaDanvers]

Thank you so much Hebe! :)

[Coyote Poetry]

You are right.
"I am a person with flaws,
I am a person that is struggling,
But refuses to say a word,
Because this is my fight to lose."
The above lines are true. Each of us have our own enemies to fight. Thank you for sharing the amazing poetry.
Coyote

[writ rajat]

i will not copy some lines of poem to gain points like other reviewer but i want to say that this poem is completely relatable

[Honourbrite]

Honest, raw, and haunting.

[B]

It takes great amounts of bravery to speak so honestly of something we all fight daily
and those who can admit it
survive it

very well placed
thanks for writing this

[WillaDanvers]

Thank you!

[duff]

I can relate to this and I think you did a great job conveying the emotional side of it. Even in simple times everything still seems so dark and confusing.

I like these lines.
"A disease I cannot fight"
"Conforming to each of my strategies"

Nice work!

[WillaDanvers]

Thank you! :)

[duff]

You're welcome!

[Dr. YumnaKay]

"Do you know the feeling,
Of drowning whilst sitting in air,
The feeling of a world gone wrong,
When your life has been so simple,"

I can relate to this write at some level. Knowing that you have to fight yet having the feeling that you're gonna lose at the end.. Not a pleasant feeling at all.

You penned the dilemma well. Good emotional depth here..