~ Soft Whispers

~ Soft Whispers, Elisa Laura, Dark, Fantasy, Ambient, Dreams, Dream Visions, Night Walks

~ Soft Whispers

 

 

Soft sounds,

Rippling, like fingers

On a table

 

Long pauses, silence…

Returning rhythms,

The whirl of thoughts

 

Of you in me...

 

I hear you for years,

In nights, like these

 

Before the moon is full,

Do you want 

           To tell me something?

 

“Tell it to me,

            Say it!”

Stop whispering…!

 

You can trust me,

The sea is ours

 

And I was there for centuries,

But your name was the future,

 

Like a mirror of the ocean,

 

Now we will never be

Together, my own soul,

 

My previous life...

 

 

~ Elisa Laura

Author's Note

Reviews

[Robert Tusitala O'Neill]

I love the vastness of this poem. It uses references to such a wide expanse as a backdrop and it really is a benefit to what I am feeling that you are meaning. The contrast between vast and specific, centuries of time and things that happen in a moment...the wide expanse of the sea and the specificity of fingers tapping on a table, it all adds to the feeling of the depths of this emotion. You have made me realize something about writing; I need to take an idea from music and use it in my poetry. In musical recordings there is something they call the "Pad" in the background. It is not an instrument. Instead it is the collective "background noise" which the producer/sound engineer has built into a feeling. The Pad includes the echo of a wide opened room, or the immediacy of the feeling the singer is right there in bed with you. All these feelings are part of it. If you hear a seagull just for as second in a song, then you immediately think of that song as taking place at the beach. In the case of this poem, the clever "pad" you set down of vast time depth and wide ranges of distance really supported the themes well.

Truly Ro, such a great review from you my friend, not only do you seem to understand my subconscious, but also, the facts of "lucidity". I think you exactly felt here too. (that's a great combination), and I am truly happy you did. Many thanks these are reviews, I hope for, and will dig your words truly! - Elisa

[Robert Tusitala O'Neill]

Many thanks for your excavations, and may you dig up great treasures, from one archaeologist to another!

You're welcome, I've learnt much today from your point of view. And what a wonderful inspiring words here... may you too!! ;)

[Eric Pudalov]

Robby, I appreciate this review as well! That concept of the "pad" is something I haven't necessarily applied to my poetry before, and yet it seems so important. I remember reading an interview with John Paul Jones of Led Zeppelin, and he was talking about the song "Going to California," saying it "sounds like lawn sitting." I think that's part of what you're talking about; the "pad" built into the song gave it the overall feel of someone playing guitar and singing out on a grassy lawn.

Thank you for replying to this......

[Robert Tusitala O'Neill]

I totally agree about Led Zeppelin! This is just what I am talking about!!! It really is possible to do this in poetry. It takes a clear idea of how to lend a feeling to something, but with the smallest of allusions!

[Eric Pudalov]

You know, I may have done it in my poetry without realizing it - I didn't know there was an actual term for it. But I think that creating an "environment," if you will, is part of good storytelling. Perhaps in the next poem that I write/publish on here, I'll keep that in mind.

[Robert Tusitala O'Neill]

It is something I notice that good writers can do, but other writers really can't. It is the art of creating an environment, but then only barely alluding to it. A good writer can give you the barest details, but you still can fill in the rest for yourself. It is a unique ability and I don't know what the word is for it, but it is a way of showing without really even needing to give the details. You have to sense your audience so well that they don't even know what you are slipping into their minds.

[Eric Pudalov]

We had studied something like that in a poetry workshop I took. We did a lesson called "overstatement/understatement," and I decided to go with understatement. I wrote a poem about rape, but never explicitly stated that it was about rape...I just described the feelings between the man and the woman. I think that's what you're talking about, if I'm not mistaken?!

[Robert Tusitala O'Neill]

That IS what I am talking about! Brilliant use of understatement!! It allows the audience to participate when you leave things out but trust them to fill in the gap!

[WatcherInSilence]

Very passionate and very emotional! A great write and an even better read!

Thank you very much for the kind words WatcherInSilence ;)

[Dye]

There is something so haunting, yet beautiful about this. The way the poem opened with the fingers drumming created a visual that tied in with this music wonderfully.

Thank you so much for the kind words my friend xxx :)

[Ken Simm.]

The Symbolists. The paintings of Odilon Redon. Old stories of mythic landscapes and romantic people. All these things this lovely write brings to the forefront of my mind. This write is the true meaning of visceral.

Thank you my friend, for this most great review. I'm humbled truly...

[Matt Sayer]

A carousel of existence, where with each revolution we glimpse semi-familiar shapes in the surrounding shadows. Who's to say we do not live again and again, swapping steed for lion, bear for giraffe? The midnight echoes whisper of these past revolutions, speaking in foreign tongues of loves we have loved, lives we have led. Magnificent poem, Elisa! :)

And then, I heard a soft whisper from down under, (Australia) within the subconcious night, of the low Netherlands. It was like I read a dreamscape, of brilliance... Thanks Matt, for the review. Holland greets you! :)

[Baby Ricochet]

Wow this is the total package. The poem is great the picture is great the song is great. Outstanding presentation Elisa

Thank you so much my friend, I'll be back for you, when I'm on Dutch ground again :)

[Soumyo]

Amazing. The poem has depths that takes ones imagination to a whole different level. And brilliantly stylized. It was an awesome experience to read it.

Thank you so much Soumyo.

[Jack...]

Standing on that silent shoreline peering out upon the vastness that is life and realizing, you have been here before, the memories of those days fall like tin soldiers as you hope the one that remains standing speaks the truth you have waited so long to hear. For it is in this truth that you shall find your destiny, filling your heart with the dreams of your existence. Wonderful and haunting my sweet friend. Your words are always so soft, flowing and whispering that which the mind seeks...beauty.

What a beautiful review Jack... Let's hope you're right :) thank you very much friend! means a lot!

[Kenneth The Poet]

Great work, like two lovers that can't ever be together (star-crossed comes to mind). That's what I see her when I read this.

Thanks sweet Ken for your review here too, it was a real dream I dreamt, and wrote it out pretty soon after... still even I am figuring out what it means :) good to have you by! means much always!

[redzone]

hmmmm don't know, but with an eye like that, do you really want it to say something??? I think I will be happy just reading your words, hope you don't mind... like the feel of "And I was there for centuries, / but your name was the future." ~~redzone

Thank you redzone, for your review :) I truly appreciate your thoughts. - Elisa

[Arcus]

This brings forth so many feelings for me, as it reminds me of what I have experienced in my life. It is very moving, and very well written. Splendid work, friend. :)

Thank you so much my friend, your words encourige me. :) so happy to see you by, and that you felt a connection to this one.

[Arcus]

Thank you for sharing. :)

Thank you friend, and you're welcome, it's great to have you by! :)

[Arcus]

Why, thank you. You are most certainly welcome. :)