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The Sound that Spins

The Sound that Spins

A Poem by H L Rose
"

If only sleep would find me before the song ends.

"
The sound that spins 
And the ballerina that twirls, 
A player of the violin, 
About the Christmas tree, snow whirls 

Around notes go 
While the carousel still revolves 
The dancing of the piano 
Until silence steels the resolve 

Incomplete song 
Distasteful ending that enchains 
Taking away the restful calm 
Shackled to its eerie remains 

Turning its key, 
What kindly ends, again begins, 
If you would sing, then I could sleep, 
Into the night, the sound that spins 

© 2019 H L Rose



Author's Note

H L Rose
Curious if this makes sense to anyone, or if it needs to be more clear.

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Featured Review

The beauty of poetry is that it is allowed to be open to interpretation. You only need to say so much, and this is wonderful.....deeply lulling and melodic, and that last stanza is a tremendous climax to a magical dance into dreamland. Last Stanza Line 3 would be better off as "If you would sing, then I could sleep" for then the musicality flows nicely, and also you hit the two "s" words in a very magical way. Well done!

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

H L Rose

1 Year Ago

Thank you! That’s a good piece of advice!



Reviews

most definitely makes sense...for me, it is about that circle of life...and how when one arc ends another takes its place to keep the circle spinning in its orb.
i remember prom...our theme song was On a Carousel by the Hollies...we went round and round that night, first dancing, then arguing...and by the end of the next day..part of the circle was gone.
opened the door to another...and the circle was completed again to continue.
i am shackled to many eerie remains from my life...but there are still nights of restful calm and no regrets...
i wonder if we could ever get totally rid of the sound that spins...and the regrets.
j.

Posted 1 Year Ago


H L Rose

1 Year Ago

Thanks! Your perspective has actual given me more perspective on my own poem, so thank you!
I don't think more clarity is needed. The way it is now, with the unique rhymes, lends an air of mystery to the piece. Though the images should be cheery, there is an aura of sadness to them, and something hints that a romantic disappointment is behind it. Very well put together.
PS: Do a spell check on carrousel in verse 2 and it's in the last verse.

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

H L Rose

1 Year Ago

Thank you! My grammar skills are in a poor state so that is very helpful!
The beauty of poetry is that it is allowed to be open to interpretation. You only need to say so much, and this is wonderful.....deeply lulling and melodic, and that last stanza is a tremendous climax to a magical dance into dreamland. Last Stanza Line 3 would be better off as "If you would sing, then I could sleep" for then the musicality flows nicely, and also you hit the two "s" words in a very magical way. Well done!

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

H L Rose

1 Year Ago

Thank you! That’s a good piece of advice!

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119 Views
3 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 2 Libraries
Added on January 7, 2018
Last Updated on February 11, 2019
Tags: Poem, music box, sleep

Author

H L Rose
H L Rose

Who knows , 🤷‍♀️



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I aspire to be all that he’s created me to be! Chances are, if I have put your piece on my reading list, I have already read them. I just take a long time to review. BUT I'LL GET THERE! 9 .. more..

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A Poem by H L Rose