Insomnia

I spin the clock and watch

the numbers slowly drip

backwards down my

bedroom walls

The eternal darkness engulfs

me like a smoldering blanket

of exquisite wonderment

I lie awake as the silence

reverberates in my ears

It torments me like an

evil clown

Shrieking with laughter

so loud

so shrill

That it cracks the porcelain doll

that I have become

I light a candle to see my

broken fragments,

to behold the glorious

pieces of myself

scattered like glitter

on my bedroom floor

My beauty swept up in

the ashes of my childhood

"Your ugly," she says

"Your worthless," she says

"You should of been a boy,"

she says.

But I'm not a boy

I'm a little girl

hiding in the closet

Praying

Praying that your rage filled hands

stop punishing my existence

Praying that you stop

dragging my innocence

through the jagged lines

of my tears

Praying that the monster

that lives in the back of

your throat chokes on

the venom that you spit

over and over and over

again

I spin the clock and watch

the numbers drip slowly

down my bedroom walls

The grains of reality

melting away as I

twirl like a fairy princess

through the fluttering crowd

of neon lights and

chemically induced smiles.

The music ravaging my

entire body

like electrocution

to my bones.

My movements

whimsical

uninhibited

free

I spin the clock

"Will you marry me"

I spin the clock

"I can't save you"

I spin the clock

"Get off me"

I smash the clock

"I'm gone"

I stare at the moon

and talk to the stars

I hum love songs softly

to myself

while drawing imaginary

pictures in the obscurity

of my room

I smile at the thought of

summers so magnificent

rainbows melt in the

sweet summer sun

I smile at the beautiful

faces of my daughters

laughing at the magical

moments of their

imagination

I smile at

true love

sweet nothings

and

sapphire kisses

I smile because

life is a fantastic thing

when you learn to

let go

and

live it

Reviews

[John Alexander McFadyen]

The opening stanza is a real draw to the reader and you describe the frustration of insomnia well. I thingk the message is also a worthwhile one although I felt the poem changed tack and lost focus.

[Bushra Naqshbandi]

This is a striking poem in many aspects.

Praying that the monster
that lives in the back of
your throat chokes on
the venom that you spit
over and over and over
again

I especially loved this part. :) Well done!

[Zeldablue]

Thank you!!!

[Harley Quinn]

This drew my attention. I liked it a lot. :)