True Beauty

I wrote this for my girlfriend

Like a soft meadow of grass

That drifts down towards the bottom

Of melted milk chocolate

Which flows together precisely

This is true beauty

 

An ocean of blue that makes me smile

Turns to a light green, like a taste of mint

Next door are riches

With jewelry buried deep

This is true beauty

 

Further down is a candyland

A sweet taste I get whenever I see them

A crave meeting them throughout the day

For they allow for me to be happy

This is true beauty

 

For when I look at your face

I become lost in heaven

I see your hair, eyes, ears, and lips

I know that I want to wake up to them

You are true beauty

Author's Note

Thanks for reading, rating, reviewing. I hope you enjoyed :)

Reviews

[Trigorin]

Unfortunately rather generic, but you can tell that there's a definite adolescent, yearning quality in there. A lot of love poems come across as rather obsessive, and it's very hard to avoid that. You've done a fair job - your writing is technically correct, if a little flowery, but it is still somewhat tiresome to anyone but the person to whom it's addressed to read.