Fleeting Envy

Fleeting Envy

A Poem by Aekmy

‘I’ve kind of fallen for this guy … so be careful’

Doubt. Uneasy. Regret and shame. I fell for him and hard did I fall. Instead of keeping my feelings tied up at the dock I let you pull straight in to keep me in your arms. A liar is what you are. We had such good times, but you felt the need to shatter it all into tons of millions of pieces. The glass shards plant in my feet and as I walk they remind me of you. Pain here. Pain there. But the pain in my feet cannot compete with the pain in my heart. Unwillingly my distorted mind fills with the lost memories of our past. The past that doesn’t have the slightest chance of becoming the future once again.

You held my hand

Opened a door

Kissed my cheek

Butterflies soared

Blue eyes bearing into mine, transmitting signals I misread. You were saying goodbye when I was just saying hello. Will you ever know? Know the trouble and chaos you have caused in many young hearts. I. Believe. No. no, no you don’t. haven’t. can’t! sighs disrupt the silence and then sobs. Thinking of you this much has corrupted my senses and out they come. Soaked cheeks. Blood shot eyes. Could it get any worse? Yes, yes it can. I’ll have to see you gorgeous face tomorrow. How can I do that without breaking down? I guess I’ll have to do my best.

Your best? Pshhh – My heart scoffs.

Not this again – I roll my eyes.

I told you so

You told me nothing! – I yell. - Foul, living, stupid thing. – I mutter.

I told you a lot of things, but obviously you weren’t listening.

Why would I listen to you?

Because I told you to! – it yells. I consider pounding in my chest just to hurt the thing.

I’m not always going to listen to you, you know.

No, but now I do.

-Silence passes-

Wait awhile – it instructs – some beautiful boy will come along that’s worth you tears…

But won’t make me cry, I know.

Good girl.

I don’t wanna fall again! – I cry

Then don’t trip – my heart chuckles.

Thanks, now that’s all cleared up! – I sit, simmering at the foulness of my heart.

Go to sleep

Dry my tears

Hold up

Fight my fears

Laugh more

Live brighter

Breathe better

Stand higher

Well heart … I think I am going to try again.

Go for it tiger. – my heart smiles

 

© 2009 Aekmy


Author's Note

Aekmy
Chello. :]
This is a little sequel to Timeless Love. Fleeting Envy (this one) is kind of the opposite of Timeless Love, but I love the little darling all the same.

When you submit a review please don't nag on me about grammer, especially run on and too short sentences becuase I know they are there. It's poetry. Poetry is sometimes not exactly on good terms with correct grammer. Okay, now that i have that out I can tell you why I am ranting.
I posted Timeless Love another site of mine just to see what poeple would say and one person nagged about my grammer. I told this person 'it's peotry!' and he got all mad, so I hope you all aren't angry as of now.

I don't mind grammer criticism, but please remember it is poetry.
Thanxx loves. :]
Have a good day and God bless you all. :D

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Reviews

Aimer, I liked this poem, and not all of us are English majors, so I wouldn't worry too much about it. And as I always say opinions are like rear ends everybody has one. lol Great write.

Posted 15 Years Ago


It was better than you made it sound. i like it....

Posted 15 Years Ago



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Added on March 12, 2009
Last Updated on March 13, 2009

Author

Aekmy
Aekmy

There is beauty is uniqueness. Embrace the strange or perish in the ordinary.



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"Leaving the page of the book carelessly open, something unsaid, the phone off the hook and the love, whatever it was, an infection. - Anne Sexton" more..

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A Story by Aekmy