Pan’s Club was sparsely populated for its size.

It was alive mostly because the place was an LSD freak show, complete with the freaks. They had everything, anywhere from midgets in latex undergarments glistening under black lights – to a full on sword swallowing contest that more often than not ended in a pile of bloody vomit on the floor.

“So, what do you do for a living?”

The girl asks me, holding a large mug of Dos Equis. I look around at her, my head on a greased swivel. The booze helps.

“I rape pretty girls.”

She looks at me funny, and she lifts her low cut shirt uncomfortably. She is kind of pretty. I look at her up and down, and even under the light, I can see where she painstakingly rubbed some sort of glitter solution all over her visible flesh.

“Just kidding, hmm…”

I mumble.

“But don’t you suspect someone will rape you?”

The music plays subtly in the deep bass of the club. She smiles wide, and her teeth glow a greenish white under the light. My eyelids are heavy so I make an effort to keep them open, so much as to where I look bizarre and unnatural. The outline of her body looks a little blurry.

“That’s what I’m hoping someone will do.”

She stands up and wedges my leg between hard, muscular, almost trapeze artist, thighs.

“Will you be the one tonight?”

She opens up her purse and takes out a paper tile of LSD and places it lightly on her tongue. I nod my head to the beat of the music. She leans in to kiss me and I embrace it, gripping the back of her neck in a sadistic way. I taste the beer and cigarettes and LSD on her tongue. The air sprays out of her nostrils in a disgusting way, so I break away from her. She already starts to trip.

“It is so hot in here, can you believe it?”

“I so can…what’s your name?”

Her eyes roll around in her skull and her hips begin moving in a twist that goes along with the deep beat of music.

“Did you already forget?”

She yells.

“You don’t know my name and I’m sitting here humping your leg.”

“Yeah, just like a stray dog.”

I say.

“What?”

“Nothing! What’s your name?”

The chick yells over the music.

“People call me Elesdee. E-L-E-S-D-E-E.”

“Well, Elesdee, lets dance.”

She attempts to get up and falls off of her barstool with this loud “Oof!” I sit there and begin laughing and she struggles to get up. She begins giggling, and screams,

“This floor is so awesome!”

At this point in time, her colors get so vibrant, and the projection screen’s equalizer beings to fade off and dive into a realm of dimension. I pick her up, sliding my hands onto the bare skin that was showing on her lower back, feeling a strange vibrant ecstasy equivalent to worms under silk bliss. We stumble onto the dance floor, and she’s already shaking her body whilst I shuffle past this strange crowd. Before I know it, the music is louder with each passing second, and the pressure of sound waves reflect on my chest. She rubs against me as she dances, looking silly and badly imitating the dances she’s seen on daytime television. I go along, touching her every time I can, moving and jumping in a helium filled surrounding.

“Elesdee!”

I say as she slides around behind me.

“Are you thinking what I’m thinking?”

“Yeah.”

She pushes me down onto the floor, and I hit my head hard. I see a lavaburst of red colors, and my one of my ears became somewhat dead.

“Hey, what the hell?”

I yell. Then I feel this pressure around my waist, and my pants unbutton. I see Elesdee crawl over me, in the middle of this crowded dance floor full of freaks, and she starts unbutton my shirt.

“Hey, I don’t have sex with stray dogs.”

“Who’s the stray dog?”

She says, looking at me under a heavy red neon light. She grins, this awfully sober grin, and pulls up her dress, revealing a solid black pair of panties. She reaches into them, shuffling around.

“What is this?”

I say, writing under her weight. Elesdee withdraws a blue-bag of pills and rises them to the light, where the things glowed vibrantly under a black light in her translucent bag. She grabs both ends of my cheeks, and licks my face from my chin to my forehead. The line of saliva makes me feel a little like my face was divided in half, and I try to grab her, but my clamoring was off-key and weak. She takes the bag and dumps the seven pills into her mouth, but doesn’t swallow them. Then, with her mouth full, she says,

“Don’t you ever suspect someone will rape you?”

She then presses her mouth onto mine, dumping the little pills into my mouth. She pins me down, kissing me, and she shoves all of the pills into my throat with her stiff, thin, and invasive tongue. After a while I give up and lay still, and she’s feeling me up, touching me, and I can’t move. I stare at the midgets as they dance in cages. I also took time to look at the congregation of transvestites that gathered in the corner to engage in a circle jerk. I couldnt help but stare and look at the little whorls of ecstatic color on the wide projection screen.

Elesdee slides into my vision, and fixes my head to look at her and only her. My limbs have atrophied. Her dress is as glittery as her skin, and I see her hands reach toward her back to unfasten the Velcro holding her clothes together. She almost looks like a window into outer space and I want to reach out and touch her.

Even if I’m raped, at least it’s by a girl.

I think this as soon as she flips me over.

Then I hear her say, “Scalpel.”

Or did she say “Strap on.”?