Refusing to move on

Has anyone saved it?

Reviews

[hyancynthstofeedthysoul]

I know where you are coming from. I had a marriage of over seventeen years. It produced six beautiful children. One day my oldest son and I came home to an empty house. We were devastated. everyone told me to find a new mate and move on. No way when I said ''Death do us part.'' I meant it. That was as long ago as we were together. Yet I remain chaste. Why? Because she ain't dead yet. I do not lie so I am bound by my oath. While not a follower of the ''book''. I accept the admonition “It is better not to vow at all than to vow and not fulfill” (Eccles. 5:4.

[Bhavya Kaushik]

I read all of its reviews, and I really really want to read it now...
Its so sad that writers caf� messed up everything :(
But in case, if you will find it again someday, then please let me know...

[Dorothy]

This is great. I absolutely love the flow and rythem here. You write so beautifuly!

[Serendipity]

I understand your pain; I have lived it for almost two decades, 17 years. I moved on with my life finally allowing love in again. In my life I moved on, but my heart lingered. Always wondering "what if". I finally got my answer. And the truth is he has never deserved me nor my love. He has never deserved even a second thought. But you don't realize that when you are in pain. You don't realize that until later in life. Eventually you will find love, but it is not easy. Because even if it pounds on your door, it only sound like a soft knock. But pay close attention and open the door. Don't keep it close, you will be happy again.

[HoWiE]

An emotional and heartfelt piece - it's strange how the break up of a relationship can completely change a persons thought patterns. This outlines this process perfectly I think. Thanks for entering my contest and good luck. Cheers! HoWiE ;-)

[[Starshine] Faerie]

Oh my word. How fitting. How very fitting to how my life has been is this poem. Incredible. I am amazed. Great job. Your poetry astounds me. Your eloquence astounds me. =]]

[Nicole Renee]

This was very good! :D

[Gandré]

Time has passed me by

But I'm still stuck in the past---------this is lost energy. this energy takes your power for matters of today. We always have to force us to look forward, never back. great write.

[Russell Pennwright]

Wow! Powerfully moving.

[Shantanu]

Your feelings at the time of writing is very well conveyed in the poem. But I had a thought. It somehow seems to me that while writing when you get an idea or a rush of emotion -- you are in a hurry to put it down on paper lest it goes away. I think maybe a little more deliberation about how you want to convey the idea in words would help.
An example would be "But instead of this wretched existence,
I'd rather be found dead" -- The emotion could have been portrayed in a better way. But the good thing is that as the poem progresses the lines flow into each other much better.

[Brette Medb]

I loved the bittersweet reality portrayed in this poem and I think that most people can relate in some way to love once so passionate and amazing is lost over time. The flow was pretty smooth although I do have one little thing ...

I don't want to set your memory free.

It almost seems like for the rest of that stanza there is too many syllables in this line I suggest changing it to I don't want your memory set free...the to seems to give it one too many syllables for it to flow...

Other than that GREAT WRITE!