Mother Tomb

I think you want to be crucified, sometimes,

bobbing my head down for an apple amid the squeals of some

stillborn love child's indigo lips.

You never asked so you don't know 

how six weeks I counted his curls backwards 

until there were none.

Father's surname feather soft

In a cradle of death.

A fawn shot down,

Bright bullet hole hot springs

Spewing out

On a bed of baby's breath.

We still pull over to examine the wreckage,

Bruises blooming in the reality where I fitted 

on your bathroom floor

And death shook my shoulders 

While you frantically struggled to catch and steady them.

What's in the blood, really?

It rained hard its coagulated tendrils all through the night,

And I

Just wondered what sunrise looks like in Berkeley. 

Reviews

[Simon Welsh]

Damn.. :O this is powerful but disturbing. I love it.

[Skye]

Very soft, and very pure.

[Vikrantsingh]

Why you guys so better poems :'(
I need one on my name :P Lori sweet/interesting/unique/idol..
1st - "I think you want to be crucified, sometimes,
bobbing my head down for an apple amid the squeals of some
stillborn love child's indigo lips."
2nd - "Father's surname feather soft
In a cradle of death."

These 2 stanza are more powerful :)

Regards,
Vikrantsingh

[Ravyne Hawke]

As one who suffered two miscarriages, I can completely relate to this poem. The loss of a child is the hardest thing to go through. You did a wonderful job of relating this and the disconnect one must endure to get through life. Such beautiful imagery. I especially loved the reference to the fawn. Lovely beyond words. Wonderful job!

[Entropy of the mind]

pure, raw emotion
beautifully poetic
keep it up

[Coyote Poetry]

I had to read the poem a few time to grasp the content. The strong description took me to struggle and deep thoughts. I like the question in the poem. You gave the poem a feeling of real life with the last lines.
"And I
Just wondered what sunrise looks like in Berkeley. "
Thank you for sharing the excellent poem.
Coyote

[Jack...]

Having never gone through this I felt a bit lost but I understood the sadness of making the hard decision, the pain of loss and the emptiness it must have left behind. very good.

[John Lauterbach]

I have trouble relating to this, being a man and never having gotten a girl pregnant. It doesn't make abortion sound fun, for sure. On a level, it feels like the piece addresses pro-life people to say, "Yes, I made this choice, but it hurt me to do it."

I love the last line; that change in subject and evasion of whatever terrible feeling is brought out.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

This is such a well written poem that drags the reader into emotions most of us would choose to avoid. It expresses that overwhelming feeling of abject sadness that can only come through loss of a child.having lost a child it really hit home.