Lights out

Show me,
The beauty,

 

On your skin
I see petals
Stretching for light
To be absorbed
So they can live longer
They beg and crowd
Around every tiny hole
In your jeans
Dying to breathe

I would hate to see
Your beauty suffocated
Hidden, underneath your clothes
How can anyone tell?

 

Your eyes,
Don't see,
What I see,
The beauty within
You complain,
The worst is happening
The red rashes spreading
The itchy scabs forming into scars
Your nightmare
Grows on your skin
You have an allergy

 

More and more
It grows
The worst in your eyes
With every tear
That falls
The lights fade
In your home

 

Within my eyes
I see the best
Of the conflict
The flower has to fight,
Hidden, underneath your clothes

 

Take them off in the dark...

 

 

Reviews

[Ashesh]

Loved reading it! wonderful poem. Its more than a rash :)
thanks for sharing.

[Daniel Gardner]

"Within my eyes
I see the best
Of the conflict
The flower has to fight,
Hidden, underneath your clothes

Take them off in the dark..."


I loved those last lines. excellent write.

[Angie Diane♥&hea..]

This was a sad poem. I feel bad for the person that is suffering from this. I know it's probably really hard on them. It's hard to understand them when you aren't going through the same thing. I think you did an excellent job...by trying to show them that they are worth something. Thanks for sharing. :)

[PoppySilver]

It can make life so dreadful to some people! This is a great poem love:)
The beauty that deserves to be seen, so often is not, the person always hides away when suffering with such an ailment!
You have crafted a beautifully moving poem here love!
xx

[Ramiz Ilham Khan]

Just so amazing. The ending is such a relief, like a solution. Like a way out of some terrible confrontation. :-)

[Daydreamer54]

Kinda weird, but it did make me wonder wat u were talking about...

[Senseless whatever]

Good write overall. I was a bit confused however, the beginning talks of physical beauty, then you switch to inner beauty. That is fine but for the writing applies to a single person, i thought. At least as i read it.
It is a good write and by the end I connected with the message, probably a little restructure is all it needs.

[David W Moore III]

I still like it, but I agree with charles, the second full stanza gets a little specific on the disorder. Maybe you should consider changng it to some sort of metaphor. Still good overall, might be better.

[justAnumber]

I like that line at the end, 'Take them off in the dark...' It really brings it all together. Thank you for sharing.

[HorrorMaster]

I enjoy it.