Broken and Sunk

Sort of a long narrative poem.

She had a smile that was just like broken glass

and the shards got inside my chest 

and tore up my heart.

and when she said not to worry

about the bruises

i stayed up and thought about them 

all night

and they blossomed like roses across her back and her arms

and i took notes on his face

the morning we were both out to get the paper

and i drove a spike through my tongue

because i wanted to scream

i felt so helpless 

and afraid

like a child with nightmares, but no parents to run to

she spent a week at her sister’s

and i prayed she would never come back

and i would miss her happily for the rest of my life.

but she came back

and things were better 

briefly

and then it got worse

and i spent nights awake 

listening 

to every scream and every slammed door

that drowned out the crickets 

drifted in through the windows

and hurt my heavy heart

and i spent days dreaming up the right words

to tell her to leave

and never come back.

and she told me not to worry

because good things take time.

she had big blue eyes that were just like sinking ships

and i stood on the shore because i could not swim

the worst sound that i have ever heard

happens to be silence 

and it filled the air

it filled the earth

it filled my throat

the night he finally went

and i stood in my kitchen

and watched the road

and waited for that b*****d to come back

and when fifteen minutes had gone by

i went next door

and knocked

and knocked

and knocked

and when she did not answer 

i came in

and when i found her

i felt sick

but i tried to take her pulse

and held my breath

and panic filled every hole in my head

and seconds clicked by

and the earth did not spin

and her chest did not rise

and i held my breath

until seconds became minutes

then i screamed

and the ambulance took too long to come

and i cried

and i cried

and i cried

and nothing could be done.

Author's Note

i have no idea where this came from, sort of wrote it spur of the moment today
i like it, but I am a little iffy on the ending and the title is sort of a placeholder.
also i am aware of the improper capitalization, not sure if i will go back through and fix it though. i will reexamine line breaks and punctuation later.
I have written about abuse several times, so I guess I wanted to find a new way to do it. brevity can be very rewarding, and right now i am focussing all my energy on school, so i really don't have time to get emotionally invested in a full set of developed characters. anyway, i hope you like it

Reviews

[AleyshaRosa]

Stunning. Breathtaking. My heart actually hurts in my chest...


she had big blue eyes that were just like sinking ships

and i stood on the shore because i could not swim


These verses told the story so simply... Also, I like how your rhyme scheme was very abstract and kept the emotion flowing throughout the poem.
Keep writing

Koodoos

[Chris]

As a story it's all too real - and yes was well developed and done. But as reality, it's an example of how a person deals with the guilt of "I should have done ...something, anything."