My Immortal Soul

I watch my son embark on life

and I wish him all the best

His way will be no easier

than it's been for all the rest

 

The first child's life is the hardest

as they blaze their new found trails

Upon their shoulders rides the weight

of siblings, hopes and travails

 

An old woman once asked of me

as she touched upon my fears

"What do you want your son to be

when he reaches adult years"

 

I thought a while then with a smile

said that"happy" was my goal

"There might be hope for mankind yet

and for your immortal soul"

We might just ask too much of each

newly born generation

 Expecting them to build upon

the previous foundation

 

It's pride that tweaks our vanity

in damned pride our soul believes

Why is it only through this pain

that by love, our soul relieves

  I'll have that old woman to thank

when I swim the great expanse

There I'll make for the distant bank

where fate may grant me that chance

 

Tate

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Reviews

[zainul]

I dedicate my reverence to Tate Morgan who presented this masterpiece for the community of humans engaging their talent and time in WritersCafe.
This poem has envisaged a popular discussion which has already earned about 80 reviews ans 800 views.
I feel proud that Tate has become in his right a great preacher for the good of family,children,tradition and heritage.
Reading all the amazing reviews,I am convinced to say that the world still belongs to pure human beings,not to the fictional characters like vampires,wolves,ghosts and aliens.
Family bondage,love among parents and children,social norms and values and responsibility of parents to their children and vice versa still make the world moving like an entity.
Tate created this poem instilling all good characters of good poem with rhymes which he specifically mentioned in his note.This is a lesson for all of us who choose perfection.
He tried to add other elements to amuse his readers too.The portrait of a happy child in a field of cereal makes me so happy that I feel myself in the paradise.
The addition of wonderful music video to entertain the readers reflects his taste of classical heart.
I agree with all reviewers what have been noted here for the benefit of our children.I strongly feel
that this poem along with its precious reviews is a great symbol of benevolent poetry.

[Tate Morgan]

What could I say to that fine review that wasn't felt in the reading of it? Truly a genuine and benevolent gift .I I feel honored and humbly thank you
Tate

[zainul]

I feel honored that you have accepted this humble review.
Thank you very much.

[TL Boehm]

Yup. I have an heir and a spare. Although my first born is simply breezing through life. This is a lovely poem

[Tate Morgan]

I love the idea of the heir and a spare i have but one myself

[SheWolfNLust]

Oh this surely is most breathtaking, its all we all can hope for our kids, that they turn out well and prosper in life, thank you so much for recommending this poem, I enjoyed it very much, I hope that you'll pass by me as well, even though most of my works are on all poetry, I do have some here and post occassionally as well, also thanks so much for your friend invite, hugs to you my new friend xoxo

[Brave girl]

i like the rythem,you're really good at this,and you're a good father too...good write!

[K. D. Kromminga]

Sometimes its better to create new buildings then to build on old foundations. Old foundations can become institutionalized then serve only to restrict the paths that we can chose from. It may be scary to encourage someone to explore the unknown, to blaze a new path for themselves and others to follow, but sometimes its the only way to be true to themselves and find the happiness at the end of the road.

[Bellarina]

No words can truly express how much I like this. Very well structured. I love it. Plain and simple. It's wonderful.

[Levi Levin]

This was written with excellent rhyming! It takes a good writer to write such material:)

[CecilA]

Tate,

It's a priviledge to know you as a friend and to read your awesome poem. Amen to the previous allocades. I appreciate being able to learn from you. You are an inspiration. The world needs more Tate Morgans.

I love your composition as well as the poem. It's 3D poetry. Thank you.

[Priscilla Moore]

This is beautiful Tate! The sincerity, the depth, the lesson... if only all humankind would live inside that type of pure and absolute love, well, what a revolutional experience that would be! Such love is hoped to be contagious, yet how do we infect a world where many, so many never have been touched by this love... breathtaking dear friend!

[Carolann Dowsett]

I think happy is the best wish we could ever have for our children. Another beautiful write.

[Mark Anthony Games (Hum..]

My Immortal Soul
(Review for Change the World Competition) I really like this work, The subject could be interpreted as downbeat, however the rhythm of the work keeps you happy despite the dangers of the subject. For this reason I increased the original score of 5 out of 10 for art upon my second read. You also scored highly in Flow and Honesty. I did feel a slight dip midway through, but I had the indication that this could well represent the pause is contemplation that the soul may experience upon the journey you described, and I liked that concept alot.