Incorrect captcha

what if I really am I robot. I mean I failed the captcha test 12 times.

“The world is so monotonous. Getting up one the same bed every morning, brushing your teeth with the same brush, bathing in the same bathroom, eating the same vegetables in the same damn plates each day every day. Although you go to a new class each year, or get a promotion every few years,  Nothing really changes.

I don’t really remember the date. I just remember that it was in right in the middle of the summer of that year. Back then, I had a telemarketing job for a very prominent . Sure, each person has a unique voice, but they all whine about the same damn things. I felt like I was stuck in a never ending loop I could never get out of.  My office was only three blocks away from wall street. the view from the office was fantastic, but no one ever stopped to look out even for a moment. If you did, you would be considered a slacker.

I was late by 7 minutes that day. Although it doesn’t seem much, Nelson, my supervisor was gonna chew me raw. I hurried to my grey, cramped cubicle as fast as I could. After cracking my knuckle, I turned on all the seven odd switches inside my cubicle in under   70 seconds (just a little something I am still proud off). My laptop turned on at a snail’s pace.

“Go on Smith, I would love to know your password.”

It was a familiar voice.

“Good morning, Mr. Nelson.”

“Late by seven minutes, eh?”

“yes sir”

“Don’t sweat about it. Happens every once in a while.”

This was a first. Nelson not being frustrated by an employee not being late? Something was up.

“Anyhoo Smith, you’re really good with that techno stuff, right?”

“Oh. Not that much really, I only know the basics”

“Don’t be shy, Smith. Now, I want you to do a very important thing . I forgot the password of my office email id. Can you do somethin about it? make it top priority”, he walked away.

      ***

I grew up around computers. When I was a kid, they seemed like magic to me. I could do anything with them.  My parents were well off, and my dad would buy me the latest tech year after year. By high school, I knew I wanted to do after high school.  Got into a nice college on the east coast, got a job after graduation. Worked there for  a few years. Lost my job when the company shut down in the 2008 economic recession.  Suffered dengue. Had to stay inside for a year. Couldn’t find a job after that, and ended up working in a call center to make ends meet, where, I now had to recover my boss’s email id.

Well, it won’t take much time, I thought.  In a few minutes, I had almost completed the process. The last thing left to do was enter the captcha. After that, I could start listening to people whine again.

It only took a few clicks to finish the captcha. I clicked enter. And waited.  A grey circle rotated in the captacha a few times.  Then, a notification popped up.

INCORRECT CAPTACHA.

“huh, that’s weird”, I said under my breath, while I hit reload. A new captacha box appeared.  I clicked a few tiles and hit enter. The grey circle popped up again.

INCORRECT CAPTACHA.

“Again?!?!”, I exclaimed. “Maybe I screwed up again.”

I hit reload again.

    ***

“Smith, did you do it or not?”Nelson shouted down the corridor.

“Almost done sir!”  I shouted back , with a hint of nervousness in my voice.

I think Nelson caught the nervousness in my voice. Maybe that’s why he came to my cubicle.

“What happened?”

“Oh nothing sir, just couldn’t get the captcha right.”

“what the hell is that?”

“its kind of a test to prove that you are human”

“Why would they need that? Its not like my vacuum cleaner is gonna use email. Here, let me do it.”

I obediently slid my chair to the side. Nelson made a few clicks, and hit enter. The grey circle appeared again.

I watched in horror as I saw the inbox appear.

“well, that was easy. Why couldn’t you do it, eh Smith?”

“I don’t know sir.”

“Maybe you’re a robot” he laughed. I managed to let out chuckle.

        ***

12. I did it 12 times. But I got it wrong each time.  Am I really a robot? Was the only thing I could think as I headed back home.  The street lamps casted a dull orange light everywhere. “that’s not possible” I thought. “ don’t think too much about it. you’re just tired. All you need is a drink.”

My home wasn’t that far from my office. It was cheap apartment building with just as cheap wallpaper and plaster falling everywhere. I unlocked my door, got in, and poured myself a glass of whisky. I switched on the TV. The news had nothing interesting. The sports channel was showing the highlights of a Laker’s game. I drank my whisky quietly as I saw men running around on TV.

“god damn it.” I suddenly exclaimed. I just couldn’t shake the feeling. Maybe I was a robot. That’s why everything felt out of control. Repetitive. What if I was robot designed to the same things each day  every day?  Nah , that’s impossible. But then again, I had always felt that I had never  been in control. It felt more like I was watching someone make me do things.

I got up swiftly and got a knife from the kitchen.  If I was a robot, I wouldn’t bleed right? I cut my finger. Blood started  oozing out of the small wound. I sighed with relief. I wasn’t a robot after all. Maybe the captacha had some sort of glitch. If it was true, the it meant that I was just fooled by some glitchy software. I finished my glass of whisky, and went to sleep. But doc, I still cant shake the feeling. It’s been 12 years.”

“Smith, you are just imagining things. Its just your brain creating things that aren’t there.  Think about it, you can bleed like a real human.  Sometimes , I feel like that too. maybe it was the stress from that job. Look where you are now. Your own home, a wife and a kid too. can they be robots too? that’s what I thought. Its really common to experience these kinds of thoughts when you are under stress. Take a vacation, smith. Relax. Your mind will automatically stop thinking about things like those.”

“well, I guess you are right doc.”

                  ***

“What do we do now? ”

“I thought you were trained.”

“They don’t teach us about the older models anymore.  I am working here only because I couldn’t pass the advanced test. Why do they even have this timeline running?”

“Contractual obligations.”

“Seriously, we are the smartest species of living organisms in the universe, and we still have to fulfil some ancient contract?”

“Well, there’s one more reason.  This version comes in handy for test runs of the newer models of the AI. Glitches are real easy to spot in here. Like the one we spotted today. The AI  still cant solve captcha. Which means they still aren’t human enough.  But it’s interesting to think that he thought he was a robot instead of a simulated AI. More importantly, why couldn’t  the program detect this for 12 years  in simulation time?”

“Geez, I don’t know chief. Maybe  we should inform R&D”.

“Well, you aren’t  a dimwit after all.”