The Becoming

The Becoming

A Poem by Bhavya Kaushik















_________________

 

THE BECOMING

 

 

Lost in myself, standing in nowhere,

I can not hear the sound of my own heart.

Ripped by the hands of fate I rest here,

Where time constantly tears me apart.

 

Your memories never leave me alone,

And like a strong gush of wind they drive.

Creating a sense of coldness across me,

I’m frozen here; I have no place left to hide.

 

In this world where you are no longer here,

I try to live with your absence, but I can’t.

Nothing completes me now, I feel broken,

I can not feel a beat inside of my dead heart.

 

Sleep seems like an hallucination to me now,

I lie awake when my face hits the morning light.

I still can not sleep on your side of the bed,

That void haunts me at every solitary night.

 

I wake up with your thoughts every morning.

And I sleep with my eyes holding dreams of you.

I’m still here, walking like a ghost from the past.

But you remain in my heart, no matter what I do.

 

There is nothing left except silence in my life,

The kingdom of childhood inside of me is dead.

I feel nothing, I’m numb, and I’m lost inside out,

Your void makes me feel a sense of constant dread.

 

Everyone continued to carry on without you,

Nothing drastically changed in their world.

But my entire world just collapsed at that day,

And after that nothing much has occurred.

 

Sometimes when sadness takes over me,

I just hug your old clothes which smell of you.

Your scent is still there in your old mauve sweater,

That helps me to overcome my nostalgic blues.

 

The wounds have turned into scars now,

But still I see your face in my every reflection.

I know now where my life’s destination is,

But I have lost the sense of every direction.

 

You took away a part- a piece of me with you,

So cleverly, that I myself was not able to see.

Though I can not become back the person I was,

So I finally became someone you never wanted me to be.










© 2010 Bhavya Kaushik



Author's Note

Bhavya Kaushik
I ....wrote this in like 15 minutes I guess, this is my raw heart ripped down on a piece of paper (computer screen, lolz)...I haven't edited it at all, this is just me...and myself and the person I became in the journey which you all (my faithful readers) experienced with me..Feel free to review, please :)

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Featured Review

Very strong emotions. And no matter what I write in the review, I won't be able to express how much this has touched me.

Quite vivid in description as well ---I still can not sleep on your side of the bed,

I cannot really point out which part I like best because all of it is so deep. These pieces are very hard to review rationally because one is not able to think with the head when one comes across something as moving as this.






Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Wow, this poem was very heartfelt and filled with emotion. I wonder sometimes what would happen to me if something ever happenned to my husband and you pretty much summed it up in this piece. Wonderful work!

Posted 7 Years Ago


Every word here was like a teardrop welling in your eyes..yes as yourself said it felt exactly like you ripped down your raw heart on a piece of paper.Poignant..

Posted 7 Years Ago


There is nothing left except silence in my life,
The kingdom of childhood inside of me is dead.
I feel nothing, I’m numb, and I’m lost inside out,
Your void makes me feel a sense of constant dread.

I truly hope that one day soon you will experience healing and know love once again. Loss is such a difficult thing. I often wonder why others seem to bounce back unscathed while I let it drag on and carry the scars. You have expressed yourself clearly in this poem. Personally, I like the title a lot. It implies that you have become a different person since your loss.

Posted 7 Years Ago


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My dear fellow, this was a remarkable piece. I could feel your emotions with each sentence and though I am not a poet, I thought this is some of the best poetry I have ever read. That is saying alot. To write it in fifteen minutes means you were indeed inspired by heartfelt feelings of loss. I do recommend you edit some of the grammatical errors which are minor so as to make it truly perfect. The title that came to me was more akin to "The Solitude". What do you think? Keep writing and keep dreaming. Take care.

Posted 7 Years Ago


I m not able to express my words because it is seriously genuinely the truth of your heart. And i loved it a lot
The way you expressed the emptiness is just remarkable.
Thank you for sharing!!!!!

Everyone continued to carry on without you,
Nothing drastically changed in their world.
But my entire world just collapsed at that day,
And after that nothing much has occurred

I loved this part and it truly shows your emptiness without her in your life.
Thank you!!!!!!!!

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


You took away a part- a piece of me with you,
So cleverly, that I myself was not able to see.
Though I can not become back the person I was,
So I finally became someone you never wanted to be.


Such deep overwhelming sadness, and if it is words of truth my heart hurts for you, loss is something so final, and nothing replaces that person gone, its an awful cliche, but time helps, good friends and family, and your ability to write such beautiful words.

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This is sad, and love can sure as hell tear you up where
you don't even seem to know yourself. There are so many emotions here,
sadness, resentment, lonliness, depression. You made the reader feel
this and relate. The end statement to me says that you became someone
that just didn't care, someone without a conscious, numb.

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

The flow is superb and the tone of the poem, nostalgic and sad, but so beautifully expressed. it brings a tear to my eyes...wonderfully done...

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

There is nothing left except silence in my life,
The kingdom of childhood inside of me is dead.
I feel nothing, I’m numb, and I’m lost inside out,
Your void makes me feel a sense of constant dread.

15 minutes, wow i wish i could write something this amazing in 15 minutes,
this is wonderful.

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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29 Reviews
Shelved in 2 Libraries
Added on August 3, 2010
Last Updated on November 28, 2010

Author

Bhavya Kaushik
Bhavya Kaushik

India



About
National bestselling author of the novel, The Other Side of the Bed. You can place an order here: tinyurl.com/tosotb (flipkart) or can download it on your kindle from here: tinyurl.com/tosotbamazon .. more..

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