The Man I've Been

The Man I've Been

I can't bear to see the man I've been,
rising up inside of me again.
I thank God for letting me see,
that that's not who i have to be.
I have turned my life around.
Inner peace is what I've found.
All my life I swear to sing,
thanks and praises to the King.
Him, who has made me whole.
Him, who has healed my wounded soul.
He has cleansed my tainted mind.
He has given me a chance to find,
my one true place on this earth.
For that, I am filled with mirth.
All I have to do is look,
directions are given in His book.
So where will I begin my search?
The directions say it starts in church.
For true fellowship is what I need.
Does not every tree begin as a seed?
I am the seed, church the earth, and Him the rain.
With this combination, I can feel no pain.
No never, EVER, will the man I've been,
gain control of my life again.

-Caleb Benton

Reviews

[Céce]

WOW...this is a gorgeous poem...not at all cliched or sentimental like most Christian poems are. Very masculine and solid writing here. I still struggle with "the woman I've been" rising up in me and trying to take over my life again...this poem is a call to be strong for God. I'm certainly going to put this in my favorites!

Amazing write, Caleb.

-Jane

[Jasmin]

This was a wonderful poem, I am not sure how many time I read it, just that I loved it every single time. I never once got tired of it. the way it flowed, the way you used every word, the way you wrote everything. it was relatable and wonderful.

[Jenn Gold]

I like it. The first two lines reminded me of a Casting Crowns song...word for word, I think. Good writing.

[Kathryn]

Although I agree about the rhyming, I loved this piece. Genuine, honest, and "relate-able."
Beautiful work, even more inspiring is the story behind it and message in it.

Reminds me of the Relient K song "Who I Am Hates Who I've Been":

"I'm sorry for the person I became.
I'm sorry that it took so long for me to change.
I'm ready to be sure I never become that way again
'cause who I am hates who I've been."

Typo: Capitalize "i" in the fourth line.
Suggestion: Consider changing the line "I am the seed, church the earth, and Him the rain" to I'm the seed, the Church the earth, He the rain

[Robert Luna]

This made for a wonderful read. I love the flowing feel of this as it carried like the wind or a soft whisper in my ear. I think this was so perfectly written as it gave a reader such a vivid image of something more than just words on a page. I love the connection I could feel to it. We all have struggled to find that better us that we know exist. It is as important to remember the person that we once were in order to appreciate the person that we continue to become.


Great Job!!!!!

[Amant Cache]

I think Lady Aerith has something. It's very thoughtful but I think you should let yourself out of the box and consider breaking your rhyme scheme. Rhthym can be had without rhyme.

[Violet Rose]

Mmmmm I wish it wasn't so forced in rhyming this time. Kind of a let down. Maybe you should even give up a scheme for a free verse or an a-b-a-b scheme. Just saying. Otherwise, it still had a powerful theme of regret.

[Monday Parker]

Very well written poem. I love how it flows down the page with such a strong meaning and truth behind it. Great job.