Friend or Foe?

Of all the people that I know,

You are the lowest of the low.

Everyday you put on a show,

but you're just an average joe.

 

You really think that  you're God's great gift.

You really think the weight's yours to lift.

Yet all that you ever do is drift and thrift

So through shattered dreams you will sift

 

You will always look, yet never find

That which brings you peace of mind

For you've isolated yourself from mankind

Don't you see? We are, all of us, intertwined

 

So when you look to those you know,

In you darkest times of dreadful woe,

They will all just watch you go below

For you were no friend, so you must be foe.

Author's Note

This actually started as self exploration. It is meant to be read by the reader, to the reader.

Reviews

[Scott Free]

I'm with Jane; How do you do those rhymes? They all, like...*rhyme* and everything...
Ha ha really good job on this one too. God you're good, Caleb!
This is your talent, it really is.
There are some extra words that you could take out in a few lines, these are some examples;
"You really think that you're God's great gift."
Minus the 'that'.
"You really think the weight's yours to lift."
Minus the 'really,' make 'weight's' into 'weight is'.
Mostly those. At first the first two stanzas struck me as judgmental, but after reading that through and realizing that it's the reader, reading to himself, they made sense. I mean, if someone is just 'putting on a show' they are just an average Joe, and nothing more. They need to find their uniqueness in Jesus.
Three thumbs up, sir!

Scott

[Pax Analog]

As ye reap. . .

Every single one of us oscillates as friend and foe of seamless Spirit. Our relative experiences are not unlike the behavior of subatomic particles, tiny figures inextricably and inexplicably linked by the Ground of Being.

The perennial wisdom of Nonduality has been planetarily available for at least 5000 years. Zen is a part of that revelatory tradition and extols "not this, not that." The dualism of self and other is a dead end street. Flip the polarity and all that remains is Consciousness. The exoterically dominant politics of belief likes to militate against this consideration, as it means the extinction of the separate self sense generating policy. The Buddhic Nirvana literally means just such an extinction.

We are all simultaneously a rise and fall of relative self and an emanation of an abiding Mystery. All the world's saints and sages are essentially tapping more of Source than is otherwise extant.

Unambiguous friendliness points out the core error of our common ways.

Your poem skillfully rhymes the truth of relativity. I just feel called to add "my" two cents re the a priori. Cheerz!

[Céce]

Now, how do you manage those rhymes? Mine always end up corny...

I like this. Very honest and down-to-earth, never dancing around the truth. Direct. "So through scattered dreams you will sift"....that really struck me as something people do a lot in this world. Almost like we're hanging onto those dreams we already accomplished, or want to accomplish, but not doing anything about the life right in front of us.

Great job, Caleb!

Jane

[T. Hart]

Great work!

I like the way you show the way you dislike yourself. And the rhyming...
Sensational!

[Amant Cache]

I like the lesson I think it must intent to deliver. I think we are meant to internalize it's accusations and self examine our the mark we leave on the world.

Of course I could be dead wrong.

Either way, you wrote a great directive.

[deeps]

I kinda know someone like this, written so well and expressed well