Go the F*** to Sleep: the working mother's version (with apologies to Adam Mansbach)

This was my response to the book "Go the F*** to Sleep, by Adam Mansbach. I wrote it in June 2011. (It took me a couple of years to decide to share it more broadly.)

It's been a tough day at my work, dear.

I'd like to collapse in a heap.

But now I've got you guys to care for

before I can GTFTS.

 

I've cooked up a nutritious dinner

and sat with you both while you eat.

I've washed all the pots and the plates, child,

now I wish I could GTFTS.

 

I've run water into the bathtub

which is neither too hot nor too deep.

I've shampooed and soaped, you're both clean now.

Hop out so I can GTFTS.

 

You're finally in your pyjamas.

I've managed to brush all your teeth.

Here comes my favourite part, dears,

The part where you GTFTS.

I've read you a sweet bedtime story

with chickens and piglets and sheep.

I've tucked you up tight and kissed you goodnight

but I still don't get to GTFTS.

 

I drag myself to the computer

and login with a whirr and a beep.

I've got so much work to catch up on.

Hours pass, then I GTFTS.

 

It just seems like five minutes later

I wake to hear one of you weep:

"My sheets and my pants are all wet, Mum".

Arrgghh!  I just got TFTS!

 

I remake your bed, kiss you on the head

and though I am tired, I feel blessed.

Your brother will wake me in just a few hours

and I'll go back to work for some rest.

Reviews

[ChemicalMadness]

A fun take on what became an instant classic....in this, as with that, every line rings true and clearly written at the hands of experience.

CM.