Oh Sweet Sorrow

This was my FIRST poem EVER & it scared the living daylights out of everybody! It's not a horror, but this was how I felt & I didn't know why.

These winter winds have wrapped around my heart making it shiver in slowing beats

And as a flower in the snow, my soul seemed to have whithered and crumpled upon icy grounds, bending and leaning, wanting support, thirsting for love and only about to break by tears that deceive my eyes  

It has surrendered in the war of reality

And I long for the spring light, looking up to clouds that reject my longing, my desire

Oh, sweet sorrow, cruel and harsh, you make it cease, make it stop, I demand

But like the clouds

You reject me also

I despise this frozen world so much that my hatred appears to warm me up

Once ago it had glowing rays and flowers that danced in winds not so cold

Once ago there had been living waters free of ice that now binds it in chains so now the living waters has ceased to breathe

Once ago there had been a sun that smiled upon such lands and smiled brightly

Oh sweet sorrow why do you not smile like the sun

Why do you not allow the waters to breathe

Why must these flowers, innocent, die in their youth

Oh sweet sorrow, I understand this happens to many others

and I am not the only flower to feel as though she is whithering in the war of reality, friends, mothers, and lovers

 

Oh sweet sorrow

Though I have crumpled

I shall not sink into the snow

I shall not disappear 

So, you winds, blow your might

I know I will see those spring rays someday 

Under morose clouds and sweet sorrow rejecting my hope, they cannot kill the hope that has warmed me more than the hatred I have for this frozen world

 

Reviews

[Carolina Kel]

That far exceeds anything I wrote in the 5th grade. It is very well written for one thing and full of emotion. You did a wonderful job of conveying how you feel in a way that is understandable.
I feel obligated to repeat this: For 5th grade, amazing. Or maybe I was just bad for a 5th grader. None of my stuff from 5th grade reads like this and I wasn't even rhyming.
Wonderful!

[♥SunkissAngel♥]

very good write i loved it.

[Camuel Choisuel]

I enjoyed it was short yet so full of passion in each phrase and stanza

[Neva Flores - Changeful..]

You were an awesome poet even as a 5th grader, this poem touches my soul......

[Livana Lowell]

Awwww, I feel so honored if I knew I didn't meet you in fifth grade! I'm better now, I think.

[Kanattas Atir Enomo]

wow. this piece was powerful. and you wrote it in the 5th grade? you've got quite the talent. it flowed rather well and the message was clear and concise. beautiful job.

[Sapphire]

is that friend u miss me, Kianna? don't die, va bene. i need you in this world with me.