Transit of Venus

Why do you run?

Transit of Venus

Tell me why you choose to hide, ignore the serenade of Midnight

And let dissipate the tempest painting on the canvas of your heart

Why do you keep temptation tame, let Phobia inscribe your name

Into the skin of your cosmic locket?

Every single day and night both destiny and time align

Waiting for you to join them on their exciting rollercoaster ride

But you are divided inside so much like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde

Knowing full well that the stars never stop marching along

Today longs to see you sail away, through the Gateway of Narnia

For you are but a glass phantom with a life like a phantasmagoria

Don't wait until the very end, when wisdom and regret coalesce

This moment is your tourniquet, the transit of Venus

Tell me why you choose to run from the frigid blizzard on the horizon?

Is it because the winter winds remind you of how cold you have become?

Descendant of Adam and Eve, in the mirror what can you see?

Your reflection is but a colorless cardinal

To the sensations forged by fire and ice you have become traumatized

What has happened to the valorous vanguard that once held your mind?

Today longs to see you sail away, through the Gateway of Narnia

For you are but a glass phantom with a life like a phantasmagoria

Don't wait until the very end, when wisdom and regret coalesce

This moment is your tourniquet, the transit of Venus

Only you can salvage your dreams from the blazing remains of yesterday

True are these ancient words that all old fathers and Nomads say

This is your chance to rise

Today longs to see you sail away, through the Gateway of Narnia

For you are but a glass phantom with a life like a phantasmagoria

Don't wait until the very end, when wisdom and regret coalesce

This moment is your tourniquet, the transit of Venus

A MESSAGE TO YOU GUYS and GIRLS:  I can say that this piece is the first piece that I've written in quite a while that I have felt proud of.  I know that the reception for my last few songs and poems have been very good, but for some reason, believe it or no, I think they are some of my worst ones to date.  To me, they are all only great on the technical side of things, not the creative and unique side of things.  It just felt like they were missing that extra spark, if you know what I mean.  However, I found that I was able to bring that spark back by listening to music while writing instead of trying to write in dead silence.  With this new technique for writing, I really do hope to continue keeping this spark going for as long as I can.  I really do hope that you enjoyed reading this song as much as I enjoyed writing it.  As always, tell me what you think!  :)

Author's Note

I know that you guys might be getting tired of the font change style I use on my lyrics, and I just wanted to let you know that I am trying to think of new ideas for what to do with the text. If you have any suggestions, please feel free to let me know! :)

Reviews

[Amber Lily]

Dan, I am so happy to see you proud and confident about your work! That within itself makes me love this song that much more. Confidence is key so keep up the good attitude :) I find it hard to be bored with your text since it seems pretty different each time, I enjoy the surprise of the layout :)
Again, you made me feel like I was reading lyrics to one of my favorite bands, you really got it in you to do this. This one has a really deep meaning and setting to the point where it could mean so many things, and I think it would be fun as hell to sing along to. Proud of you Dan! :)

[DoormanDan]

Thanks Amber. I don't know why, but even with pieces like Psalm of Fallen Angels, I was so close to just trashing it because I did not like it at all. I think it was because I felt that I was writing better on a technical scale rather than on a creative scale(I prefer it to be the other way around any day, or even a perfect blend). I'm really glad you enjoyed this piece, thank for reviewing :)

[Chadvonswan]

Like the cosmic influx of words. Weird, this reminded me of my own writing

[DoormanDan]

It's always nice when you come across somebody with a similar style to you, isn't it? I'll make sure I check out some of your work the next chance I get. Thanks for reviewing :)

[AaronFreitas]

I loved it buddy! You already know I enjoy your work and thoughts and this one is just another quality piece in your awesome writings! Great work :)

[DoormanDan]

Well I'm glad that I'm still living up to my standards Aaron, thanks for reviewing :)

[sandpiper66]

I love the poem...I am new here and am just experimenting as well. Love your imagery.

[DoormanDan]

Thank you for reviewing this, and welcome to the website! :)

[sandpiper66]

Thank you!

[jeannemarie coulter]

Only you can salvage your dreams from the blazing remains of yesterday

True are these ancient words that all old fathers and Nomads say

This is your chance to rise


really loved this image...a get up get out and do it image we all need to remember...thank you ...

[Joe_VILOT_]

brillantasto taco bunchingam the words speak to me on the deepest broher keep the spark with you at all times well done
5577755/7775577

[DoormanDan]

Well, THAT'S definitely the most distinctive review I've ever gotten! I would keep the spark with me at all times but that's very hard for me to do nowadays(mainly because I took a Michael Bay to the knee...). Thanks for reviewing :)

[Joe_VILOT_]

pain sharpness the mind my friend it will heal and you will become strong no worries pressures or fears maestro

[Emily]

I really like it!
Well done!

[Valentine]

Dan, have you ever tried humming a melody to your words. It seems there would be so many notes in each line it would be hard to hum or sing to. Valentine

[DoormanDan]

I've tried humming a melody to my words, but I'm not any good at thinking of a decent melody, so all you are seeing here are words, I'm afraid. Some of these are written to the beats of other songs, and that's probably as close to an actual beat they are going to come as of now. As far as whether or not anybody could make a beat out of my lyrics, well, that remains to be said. The genres of music that I write all my lyrics for tend to be anywhere in the range of pop rock(not as of present), rock, alternative, gothic metal, melodic metal, symphonic metal, electronic rock(rarely), experimental rock/metal, and even metal with a little bit of rap incorporated(the only time I've ever done this was with my song Declared Deceased). There are many, many different elements to a lot of those genres, so perhaps their could be a beat for at least some of my songs residing somewhere in there, or perhaps not. Thanks for reviewing :)

[Thatoetsile Simons Thup..]

I'm speechless.
Indeed this piece is one writing to be proud of.
Your character of words take me to another level.
What i can say is you are doing a good job.

Well written words and nicely used figure of speech.

Keep doing the good job.
KEEP WELL.

[DoormanDan]

Wow, I'm always humbled by such postitive reviews like this. I'm really glad you liked this! :)

[MsJewel]

I enjoyed the change in font - I play with structure and font often in my poetry. Your words are well written and truly a delight to read.

Julie

[DoormanDan]

Thanks for the review, and I'm glad to hear that I'm not the only one who plays with the font. I'm just trying to think of a different way of experimenting with it right now :)