Among the countless

Just a small poem. Not all that great. Cliche. Came up with it in 10 min. Hope you like it, anyway

How trivial my life must be

In caparison to the vast universe

Lost in the darkness of space

A single star among the countless

 

There you were, the bright and gentle moon

Gazing ever so tenderly over them all

The planets, other moons and even over

That single star among the countless

 

The numerous other stars, far brighter

Beg, plead for your attention

And yet you still find the time for me

A single star among the countless

 

You have more important things

To take care of, I say, just go

I am simply not worth it, I am just

A single star among the countless

 

Yet you stay here at my side

As I am in the warmth of your embrace

I begin to think and wonder, Am I only just

A single star among the countless?

 

Maybe I am something to notice

To shine brighter than the others

I sit think, I don’t want to be just

A single star among the countless

 

I want to be ever so bright, to shine

For the whole world to see my brilliance

So that one day someone will say,

“See that bright star among the countless?”

 

 

Author's Note

Any suggestions?

Reviews

[Tina Kline]

This is beautiful, so beautiful. I'm impressed. You did a brilliant job on this. Love it!

[Greg Skura]

Amazingly Brilliant!!!!!! i truly enjoyed this poem! great anology i admire the way you compared yourself to the vast universe and recognise the aloneness of a single star among the countless and the brightness of the moon even over you, as you perceive that far brighter stars want this moon but the moon still choses you! then self doubt appears and you acknowledge the moon is with you, then recognise the desire to shine brighter than the other stars. Thank you for sharing! ten minutes wow!

[Michael X]

this is beautifully written and expressed,the messege has imagery that takes the reader away, as if gazing
upon a starry moonlit sky, reflects a subtle, enchanting sense of affection and lonely existance, the way
you describe the single star in vast space. keep up the great work.